Thursday, September 6, 2007

When Will I Learn?!

This morning, I re-discovered one of my least favorite things about a clean bathroom: scrubbing the toilet. Now, before you reel back in horrified shock that I'm just now re-discovering this, let me explain! We do, in fact, all participate in cleaning all the major elements of our home. The Gang is an equal opportunity training facility. However, due to the toxic substances found in your average toilet bowl cleaner and the fact that most contain some degree of chlorine bleach, we have reserved the toilet scrubbing duties for The Boss and I. And we do scrub them, almost weekly :) And certainly when we have company coming. I promise.

Today's re-discovery stems from the act of scrubbing recklessly and trying to multi-task while doing so. Kudos to TCC, by the way, for her multi-tasking recognition. I do multi-task also. I just remembered this morning why I shouldn't multi-task while scrubbing toilets. While scrubbing fast and furiously, I kept feeling these little pings and stings on my capri-clad legs. Ordinarily, I wouldn't even give it a thought and truthfully probably wouldn't even feel it, what with the forest of red and blond hairs growing by the end of the week on my stubby little legs. But today I'm wearing my new(er) cargo capris that are slightly shorter than my other summer wear. And I actually shaved recently, which is definitely out of my normal Friday or Saturday morning rotation of personal hygiene tasks. (I know, that's waaaaay more than you want to know about me!) So anyway, I'm scrubbing and spraying my hair and dancing to some blaring country tune and feeling these little pings. And then the caffeine must have kicked in because I realized that when I stepped back a bit and stretched, the stinging stopped. And I looked down to see all these tiny little droplets gleaming on my freshly shaven, lotion-shiny shins. AAAAAACK! I'm bleaching my legs - after I worked all summer to develop an even, healthy glow slowly with my 55SPF.

Quickly I rinsed down my legs and smacked my head V8 style. Duh, when will I learn?! I am the proud owner of a pair of slimming, sleek black running pants - with little red dots all over the shin areas. And I seem to remember a pair of well-worn, soft, comfy jeans with little white dots all over the calves. (How on earth I got the backs of my legs, I'll never know!) So I dried off, re-lotioned and quickly prayed for a spirit of wisdom and discernment to fall on me anew whenever I pick up that pesky toilet brush again. Maybe next time I'll learn!

And for those of you concerned about my new(er) cargo capris? They're fine: seems while I was bending over, they were hiked up just enough to expose my knees and be spared the destruction! Which makes me wonder, what else are they exposing when I bend? But that's another post for another day!


Classic MaMa said...

You are hilarious! As someone who is white as Casper, I must say that it looks like I bleach my legs every day.

TCC said...

Girl - you make me laugh!!!

Jessica said...

You don't even know how many pairs of pants and shirts I have ruined cleaning my toilets. I sometimes clean the toilet in my bra and underwear just for that reason. (too much information)

carrie & troy keiser said...

Enjoyed this post. I also despise cleaning the toilet, but my kids find it entertaining (we get non-toxic cleaner ... and if it gets really bad I breakdown and get the bleach out and do it myself.) all sorts of fun in the bathroom for a 3 yr old and a tiolet brsh!