The Playlist of My Heart

I've mentioned several times in recent weeks that the Lord has been bringing songs to my heart as I've pressed in to pray for our Mei Mei. It was much the same in our journey to Li'l Empress. There are just songs that connect with my spirit in powerful ways and give me a platform from which to pray. I could never narrow the list down to "just" five when I was waiting for Li'l Empress but I did highlight many of the most meaningful songs in this post and again in this one. To this day, each of those songs brings me right back to the very moments that I keyed in on them - they remain weapons in the praying hands of this momma even now.

This journey to Mei Mei has similarly been shaped. The emerging theme of understanding and accepting HIS unconditional and unfailing love has been both humbling and empowering. Turning my understanding into prayers over my daughter has definitely eased the pain and the myopic focus of the wait for her to join our family. I'm excited to share these songs with you all - maybe when you hear one of them, you'll join me in praying for our girl?

Home by Phillip Phillips - From the moment I first heard this song on the American Idol stage, I knew it was going to be one that resonated with the nation. But I also knew that it was going to be a really important song to me while I waited for Mei Mei. I love this kid's style anyway, but man, oh man! The first couple times I played it on my iPod, I could barely see through my tears. I usually get really annoyed by "saturation" in pop-culture music but this one does.not.get.old. for me. It just keeps me trudging forward, focused on my mission to get Mei Mei "HOME!"

Your Love Never Fails by Jesus Culture AND by Newsboys - This is the song that led me to Mei Mei's life verse. The first couple times I heard it, on the Newsboys album, I found myself singing it over and over and when I was home, I'd just keep repeating it on the iPod. Then I got the Jesus Culture cd for Christmas and that whole cd became my soundtrack of January's season of prayer and fasting with our church. I soaked in these words like a sponge, praying for my own emerging understanding of His love and commissioning angel ministry to anoint my daughter's spirit with the sense of deep and unfailing love.

On a side note, in the bridge of this song, the words are "You make all things work together for my good." In the interest of being totally honest, I struggled with those words A.LOT. during this delay we've been working through. I didn't want to sing the words because they didn't "feel" true. I couldn't figure out how this whole thing was going to work to ANYONE's good. But as I was praying through it one afternoon, the Lord reminded me that while it's good and right to be singing these words out as a praise for the prior experiences of His good thus far in my life, it is also imperative that I speak them out as a declaration of truth over the current and coming circumstances I face. That I speak them as a statement of faith in His ability to continue to work all things for my good. And you know what? I don't yet understand what good has or will (or honestly could!) come out of getting to our girl six to 8 weeks later than the original time line. But I don't have to. I just have to trust that His Word is true and He is working it out. Simply cuz He says He is. That's your freebie for the day. You can thank me later.

Kicking and Screaming by Third Day - this is the acoustic version and I just love it!!! But it's no secret to those that know me that I love me some Third Day. A day can hardly go wrong when you've  got Mac Powell and friends crooning you through it! This song is from their recent Miracle album and upon first listen, I felt like it was a great word picture for how I was feeling about my girl. Even before we got the news of this paperwork tangle, when we were (not so patiently!) waiting for our very delayed Letter of Approval, this song was resonating with me. I was fighting for my girl and gearing up for whatever I had to do to get her home. Heh. I had no idea that the fight was about to kick into high gear just a few days later. Now, as I listen to it and the mission for my girl has unfolded more and more, I hear it from Jesus' own heart. This is how much HE loves her. And He's already been fighting for her since the day she was created. I can't even tell you how that makes my heart soar!!!!

Your Love Is Like a River also by Third Day - also from the Miracle album. This song has been a point of healing and refreshment for me for many weeks now. This acoustic version is new to me - I actually prefer the studio version on the album but I love that they did this right out on the streets of Atlanta. Proclaiming HIS Word and letting it take flight over the city. This song has soothed my ruffled feathers while acting as a beacon to point me to HIS purposes and HIS plans for this season of the journey. When I've felt wrangled and roughed up by the "process" or misunderstood by those around me, this song has lifted my eyes to the hills and reminded me that my help comes from HIM. Special thanks to my sister-in-law for the Christmas gift, despite my brother's disdain for my taste in music. What does he know anyway?

How Great Thou Art - the version by Carrie Underwood is on my iPod but I'm sharing the live version of her singing it with Vince Gill. It cannot be compared to any.other. live version. Any.Where. Seriously, it's simply amazing. This old hymn of adoration reminds me daily that I must decrease that He can increase in me and through me. I've always loved this hymn but in this season of my life, the comfort I derive from being reminded that it's not about me is astounding.

Similarly, Great Is Thy Faithfulness is a stand-by in my faith walk. I am sharing this version just because I love this guy's voice and heart of worship. No matter who is singing it, the anchor it provides for my heart to worship my God has stood up well in the long journey to Mei Mei. I fully expect that this and "How Great Thou Art" will again be the lullabies my baby girl hears as I rock her to sleep each night. It was and is perfect for settling the wounded and weary heart, isn't it?

These are only a few of the songs that are running on the playlist of my heart as we inch closer and closer to our girl. The Lord has always ministered to me through music, whether it's worship tunes, old hymns, or pop songs one can hear on the radio. And I'm soaking it all in that I might be full to overflow onto the little sponge of Mei Mei's heart when we finally get to hold her in our arms!

Are You Ready?!

Well, it's here. The day that millions of tweens (and slightly shame-faced middle-aged women) have been waiting for, for close to 9 months now.

Are you ready? Will you be watching? What do you think of all the conversations that are going on in the media about the new season? What do you think about the changes they've made?

Maybe a better question is whether or not you will even admit that you are a fan of what has become classic American reality television?

I'm a little bit of a fan of 2008's winner. Just a teensy. . . weensy bit.


Edited to add: I do enjoy the show, but only after the real talents have been put through to the finals. I just cannot get on board with wasting, I mean watching, hours of folks getting mocked or humiliated on national television. Being embarrassed in that way is one of my worst nightmares, so I cannot sit through even a moment of the early parts of the season. Even if the contestant has no clue how bad he or she really is. . .

The BEST Man Won!

From his achingly sweet audition tape to his outrageous performance with ZZ Top. From his amazing rendition of "Hello" to his KICK BUTT version of "Still Haven't Found What I'm looking For." Looking every inch the true American Idol that he is, the best man won it all.

America has found what it was looking for.
Finally, an American Idol for grown-ups!

I have no other words. Except, I told you so! :)

A New Low

Last night, I had to grocery shop. Couldn't put it off any longer. But since I knew it would be a tiny trip (for us!), I grabbed The Boss and my coupons and we were off. I hoofed it through the store like a maniac, shopping and plotting and searching for coupons to match sales all with one eye on my watch. Sending The Boss off (which causes fits of panic and stress every time) with very specific instructions on specific foods to add to the cart. Gaging time needed, moving faster when necessary, and hurrying the cashiers in my mind.

I paid the nice boys with the ridiculously low-slung, baggy pants (please, did that fad not end a couple years ago?!). As we threw the last of the bags in the cart, I glanced at my watch. OH NO! 8:07 p.m. I knew that since David Cook has sung his American Idol brilliance towards the end of the last couple shows, it was likely that he'd be singing his Neil Diamond American Idol amazing-ness early in last night's show. Hurry it up!!!

The Boss threw the bags in the van, I revv'd it up and picked him up on the fly from the cart corral. Seriously, the van was moving before his butt was totally planted and the door was shut. Risky, I know. And while I was flying out of the parking lot, I called the boys and made them put the phone up to the tv speakers. I caught his first song, amid a ton of distortion, in the car with my cell on speaker while trying to responsibly and legally drive home as quickly as possible. Not the most well-known of Diamond's songs, but when you have a younger sister who loved (loves?) all things Neil Diamond in her teen years (I know, that's a whole 'nother post, I swear!!), you know all these songs. He rocked it. I drove faster.

As Shaggy was putting the phone back and laughing with Dr. Doolittle over my NEED to hear David's first song, I heard him (over the UN HUNG UP phone!) say to Dr. D, "She's pathetic. That's just sad." I couldn't believe it. My 13 year-old thinks I'm pathetic. And sad. I think I've sunk to a new low. But then (after I screeched to him, "I CAN HEAR YOU, YOU KNOW!") I heard him cracking up and laughing hysterically. That punk. He knew he hadn't hung up yet. He got me. UGH. Maybe that's my new low - he got me, and he KNEW he would. Punk.

Anyway, we got home, flew in the door and made everyone help unload and put away the groceries (I may need a treasure hunter to find that peanut butter and those canned peaches!) and clean up. Just in time. Just in time for David's second song of the night. He rocked it. Again! And his hair? Dude, I think I might get mine done like that. I love his hair! Oh wait, mine is already kinda like that. Why does it look so much funkier on him than on me?! Yeah, as I was saying, David Cook rocked the house last night. He is sooooo gonna win this. Or as Paula said:

"I feel like I'm looking at the next American Idol."

Yeah. That's what I've been saying. Since his adorable audition tape.
In Simon's words, he is "brilliant!" Yup. That's what I said.

My Fave American Idol

I've never weighed in on the blogosphere's chatter and debates about American Idol in my own blog before. I've commented lots on others' blogs (cuz you all KNOW I have somethin' to say for sure!) but never felt moved enough to devote a whole post to it. Well, okay once I did, but it wasn't about who was so amazing or so talented.

Until. David. Cook.

I've watched him with great interest and more than a little curiosity since the auditions back in February. He's edgy, fresh and interesting. No bubble gum pop music with him. And when he sang "Hello" - well, I melted. Right there in a puddle in the family room. Ask my family. I know all the questions about his supposed "originality" - questions about his arrangements abound. Just for the record, he's very quick to give the credit for great arrangements where the credit is due. I know, I read the internet. :)

Then came last night. Sigh. As much as I despise Mariah Carey's music (and believe me, I do for soooo many reasons!), he took the one song that I'm sorta okay with and. ROCKED. THE. HOUSE. I could hardly speak at first. I quickly regained my ability to speak, to leap and cheer and shout my approval. I couldn't believe how amazing it was. And I'm not the only one who thinks so. Here's some feedback from the judges (yes, I took notes. I know, I'm a geek!):

"Original." "Daring." "Stood out by a mile."
"Whole package." ". . . big breath of fresh air."

Not one critique from one of the judges.
Not one.

I got a little teary (okay, I confess, I blubbered) when he teared up. For the back story on why he was so emotional, go here. I knew before the show about his brother, and just knew all night it would be his BEST. PERFORMANCE. EVER. ~ YET. ~

So, I've been saying it in comment form for several weeks - but I'm saying it here, now, in public. Well, publicly to my 5 readers. David Cook is THE ONE to watch. He's THE ONE who will take the whole AI contest. And when he does, I predict that he's going to take the whole American Idol empire to a whole new level. I know he certainly has made it a whole new experience for me.

David, if you are reading this, I have been a faithful fan
since the first time you very sweetly, humbly and sincerely
thanked the judges for the chance to go to Hollywood.
You are gonna knock this whole contest outta the park!
I just know it.

Cracking Myself Up - AI Style

Okay, did y'all see American Idol in Dallas, Texas tonight? Did you see that cute little perky newlywed, who introduced her new hunky model husband to the judges? Did you hear her say that he helped her pick her songs? And the new hubby say that he thought she sounded great? Did you hear his "Wooo Hooo!" at the end of her song?

Simon commented at the end that at least now she KNOWS that her hubby really loves her. And after she left, Simon said it again, that he "must really love her." I couldn't help it, I lost it. I just cracked up.

Maybe it isn't that he (the hunky model hubby) really thought she sounded that great. Maybe this wise new hubby is just ridiculously relieved that someone else finally told her that singing probably isn't in her future. Or maybe it's just me, cracking myself up . . .