Different is Good, Right?

I mentioned last week that this summer both LadyBug and The Boss have some extra time on their hands. Unfortunately, The Boss's recent "extra time" is the sort that none of us ever really want to embrace. Due to a departmental re-organization, he has been on "summer vacation" with the kids and I since early June. It's been quite a strange summer. Most weeks feel like an endless string of Saturdays around here, as The Boss's presence at home during a week day tend to "take us all down a notch or two" as far as routine is concerned. There are definite plus's to that environment for The Gang, especially on the heels of the very difficult and high tension winter we all just survived. I'm trying to stay focused on the plus's but I have to admit, it's not easy most days.

Ironically, the Thursday before he was released from his position, we were sitting on the couch, catching our breath at the end of a fairly "routine" day. I said something to the effect of, "Gosh, I feel like we are really settling into a good new groove. Like our new normal is here and is do-able. It's kinda nice, isn't it?"

I'm not superstitious or anything even close but golly, you can bet I'm never uttering words like THAT again around here. Sheesh.

Anyway, as I was saying, there are some "upsides" to having Daddy home for the summer. We got the gift of extraordinary quality time together as a family before we sent our boy off to Basic Training. There's never going to be another opportunity to have all 8 of us home quite like this again, now that both boys are launching off into the next stage of their grown-up lives.

~ Father's Day, June 2014 ~

~ Time to leave for Basic Training ~

Letting go of Dr. D was is really hard on both The Boss and I. But knowing that he was moving on to do something he has always dreamed of doing and seeing the excitement and joy in his eyes as he prepared to go really has made it easier. He was born to do this life he is pursuing and while we miss him terribly (like, "I hate seeing his empty bed, parked truck, and my empty couch" kind-of-terrible!), we are incredibly proud of the man he has become and the path he has chosen. More substantive letters would be nice, but hey, I know better than to expect a novel! :)

Oh, how I miss this afternoon sprawl!

The Boss was also able to finish the renovation of our deck in record time, since it didn't have to be squeezed in on weeknights and weekends only. We are so grateful that we had planned this project in advance - both because of the good timing for him to do it and the finances required to complete it. I'm tellin' ya, if you don't follow the Dave Ramsey plan for budgeting and managing your money, our gang is a PERFECT testimony of why you should! We don't do it perfectly but losing his income didn't not derail this project financially. And that's particularly awesome considering that we had demo'd the deck in early May when we had some help available to do so. Living without a deck and all that mess out there all summer would have been SUCH a huge and ugly problem for this pool lovin' gang.

Isn't it so inviting?

Come on by, the iced tea is cold and the pool is warm!

And of course, the "Honey Do" list has gotten a lot of attention since the deck was completed. Little niggling tasks that we have been meaning to "get around to," things that we have needed to repair, re-decorate, or refresh, and so on. Those smaller projects are all getting checked off the list as the days go on. He is a putter-er by nature so while he does miss the routine and structure of a work day (eh, who am I kidding, he doesn't miss it yet), he is really enjoying the time to do all this physical labor and spruce up the house and the yard.

Finally, I'm getting to tackle some projects that I've had on my mental To Do list for a long while now. I mean, Daddy is BETTER than a babysitter and he's free for afternoon swim parties. So I've tucked myself away a couple times to sort through mountains of school papers and projects from the last two school years. I purged my closet and dresser. I went through my jewelry box for the first time in probably 3 years. I even got to go through 4 bags of hand-me-downs within three days of receiving them - a record in this zoo lately! I've been sorting, streamlining, cleaning out, and yes, I'm back to writing. A slow and easy start, but I'm back.

The extra bonus of the swim time with Daddy is that Mei Mei is really acclimating to the pool quite well and coming along in leaps and bounds in her ability to trust Daddy and the big sibs in the water. AND she has slept through the night pretty much every single night for more than 3 weeks now. All that sleep has drastically improved her day-time behavior (and mine). AND her language is just exploding recently. She lightens the mood around here daily with the new things she is learning to say and the mimicry she pulls out at the funniest moments! We can't get over what a difference we are seeing in her, now that her surgeries are over and her body has come to its resting place of her new normal. It's really quite remarkable and I know The Boss has enjoyed being here to see the daily little transformations that are yielding a happier more settled and peaceful little Mei Mei.

Mei Mei turned THREE at the beginning of the summer.

Actually, the night before Dr. D left.
This is her cheesey smile on her new Kai Lan bike.

So. It's a different summer than we had imagined or planned for ourselves. And a very different kind of productivity than we had envisioned. But we're finding the new groove to it and I'm working on appreciating the time we have as a family as much as I can without worrying too much about the job leads and paychecks and insurance issues. THAT kind of worry messes with my momentum in serious ways. I'm finding it to be an hourly choice to alternatively focus my attention. It's not easy and while I do enjoy that he and I are getting these tasks done with unusual (for us) timing and focus, I do have to work to not camp in the worry-tent. I guess I can be thankful for that - it's keeping me sharp and on my spiritual knees at the very least.

It's different. I'm working to find the good in this kind of different.

Grace Like Rain is LIVE!

There's a big event going on over here that you might want to check out.... wait. Read the rest of this first. Then, go check it out.

This gal, Robin, has been an adoptive momma friend and cheerleader to SO many of us within the Chinese adoption community. I started following her original blog very early in our journey to Li'l Empress, having found her via our (then) mutual agency connections. She was such an encouragement during the long wait. And when we announced we were adopting again, she was equally supportive in both word and deed. While I've never had the privilege of meeting her in person (yet!), we've had many, many discussions and interactions over the last 6 years. Her heart is magnanimous. Compassionate. Steadfast. And Driven. This woman and her husband, in the last five years, have completed three adoptions of beautiful little girls from China. THIS time, they are going back for a little boy (oh, I could just eat him up!) AND another little girl (also quite delish!). Oh yeah. AND they have two older kids already in the mix!

Many of you are likely familiar with her work - I've shared some of it before - and some of you will be new to her creations. The stuff she sews is beautiful, creative, and intentional. She's been "firing up her mean machine" for months, crafting amazing clothing to auction in this fundraiser. This momma is no slouch - her efforts in bringing in the finances to bring these two (and her other kiddoes, frankly) are to be admired. Her work ethic and diligence have been impressive to witness. And the workmanship on these outfits is amazing. This auction is nicely rounded out by many other things donated by her friends and family for the purpose of finishing off the balance of the expenses for these two adoptions.

I know I'll be puting my name and my bid on a couple of the things lined up here. This particular event is near and dear to my heart as one of the kiddoes has a need quite similar to one of my girls. I'm always thrilled when Waiting Children come home but I love the additional connections that Robin and I will share with the addition of these two sweeties. Would you consider heading over and maybe sharing the auction with others too? Just don't bid on the stuff I'm shooting for - it might get ugly!  {insert big grin here}

Grace Like Rain
~An Auction for Caleb and Gabi~

That's A Wrap!

As the day for our departure to China draws near, I wanted to let you know that our fundraising effort with Wild Olive Tees  will end on Monday, March 25th. That will be the last day that you can purchase a tee, using our family code (WHITNEY407) at the check-out page, as a coupon code in order to  count it toward our total percentage earned for travel expenses.

If you feel led to give one last big shout out (on F@cebook, on your blog, in your networks of friends or among family), you should feel free to do so! It's not too late. You can share the link to our blog, give out our contact info, whatever. If you have questions, please contact me by email or by private message on F@cebook. Just be sure that they note our family code (WHITNEY407)  for the check-out process if they share the info or if they purchase.

We are greatly humbled and appreciative of the many, many folks who have helped us get the word out about these tees and the purposes behind them. We have been huge supporters of the team there at Wild Olive Tees from their inception. We believe in their mission and in their methods, not just for our family but for the amazing ministries that they support and the many, many people that they have helped in the efforts to build strong families. I can promise you, once we are home and find out about friends who are fundraising with them in the future, The Gang will be sportin' the tees!

As we get ready to wrap up this part of our adoption journey, it's really important that you all know how much we appreciate YOU. Your support of this effort, your kindness in sharing the project, and your purchases have NOT gone unnoticed. There's no way that I can posssibly thank each one of you in person, as it turns out that I don't even know some of you. But you came alongside us, heard our hearts, and rolled up your sleeves to help. Thank you for that.

I pray, for each of you that shared the fundraising links, purchased a tee or gave a gift beyond that, that the Lord show Himself richly to you in ways that minister to the needs in your own life. That He uniquely come down and fill the tender places of your heart with His Spirit and flood you with His love and His mercy. For that is surely what you have shown to our family. May His generosity and compassion return your gift to you one thousand times over, as only He can do.

Untangling the Tangle

So many of you have asked about the tangled mess of our pending I800 approval in the recent days! Thank you for that - really. We're astounded at how folks (virtual strangers and friends alike) have taken the time out of their own busy lives to check in on our progress toward Mei Mei. While we have certainly had our fair share of feeling helpless to "do" anything during the wait for progress, having folks come alongside us like this has been a wonderful distraction to the days of "no progress."

Here's what's the most recent update as of yesterday afternoon: (including a bit of re-cap)

On Thursday, January 31st, the Supplement 3 packet was sent to Immigration's "lock box" and our postal service tracking numbers indicated that it was received into the general Immigrations lock box in Texas on Friday, the 1st. Beginning on Monday morning, there has been a regular flurry of phone calls and emails from our agency to our Immigration Officer's desk. In that process, we found out that our case was turned BACK into the hands of the second officer to whom it was assigned. Seems that the first officer has been re-assigned and the third officer was only covering cases for the second officer as a temporary measure. The flu hits Immigration offices too - seems no one is immune these days!

Late Monday evening of this week, The Boss got notification that our paperwork was being forwarded from the general lock box over to the Adoptions department of Immigrations processing in Missouri. That was excellent news - we are in the pipeline!

In addition to our Social Worker "hounding" our Immigrations Officer daily (and with her permission), I've made contact with our local Congressman's district assistant. She's been amazing and so compassionate regarding the details of our case. Upon learning that the Supplement 3 had been entered into the processing system, she got busy and contacted the Colorado fingerprinting offices on our behalf to pave the way. It's now possible for Shaggy to get into their offices at the first possible date as a walk-in. Her advocacy on our behalf is so crucial AND so incredibly appreciated.

So, right now we are kind of in a new holding pattern. Once Shaggy arrives to his YWAM base in Colorado, he will go to the local USCIS fingerprinting site (about 1/2 an hour from his base) and walk in with both his official fingerprinting appointment invitation AND the letter from our Congressman. He's leaving Cambodia today and arriving in CO on Saturday. The Boss made contact with the leadership of the YWAM base and they've agreed to get Shaggy in to the USCIS office on Monday, the 11th.

Then we'll be in another holding pattern. (Heh. I know. So much "hurry up!" followed by a whole bunch of "wait!" to the average adoption journey. And this is by far NO LONGER an average adoption journey!)

Once Shaggy is printed, we'll need to "hound" someone (still working on who that would be!) to expedite the processing of the fingerprint results back to the Immigrations officer for the final step - that darned I800 approval we've been waiting for since January 16th. I'm working on a post will be a quick summary of what happens from I800 approval to Gotcha Day. Yes, we will finally be able to start visualizing an actual Gotcha Day once the I800 approval is finally issued!

All told, this delay is likely adding 6 or more weeks to our journey to Mei Mei. It's been very hard to sit back and be "okay" with those 6 weeks of additional separation from our little gift. Especially since we were at the "tail end" of the longest part of the journey and fully expecting to have the remaining steps fly by with our request for medical expedite in place. Talk about a crashing of expectations. In my efforts to be very real and honest about this journey, I'm going out on a limb to say that this has been a test of more than just our trust in His timing. It's been a test of our resolve, of our determination to keep focused on HIM as the author of our story (and hers). In many ways, it's been a test of our maturity - a refining of the skills He's grown in us over the many years of life experiences together. The tests (and to be fair, the rewards too) have come from the most unlikely places as we've tried to share the experience along the way.

Support and prayers from folks like you have really carried us more than we can even articulate here. We KNOW all the "stuff" of a solid faith journey. Living it daily, sometimes hourly when news changes or progress stalls, has been the focus. Choosing to act upon the truths that are in our hearts (that He is in control, HE is sovereign, HE has a plan, His timing is perfect, etc.) and then choosing to trust those truths has been bigger and harder than we expected. It's forced us to lean on HIM when we were too weary and sad to stand firm on what we know.

Yet through it all, He remains faithful. Unchanging. And very willing to show Himself merciful and mighty through the hands of those He's placed in our lives. Folks He's given to us to act lovingly on our behalf. Folks who have shown us "Jesus with skin on" in these recent weeks: Our social worker, the Immigrations Officer, our congressman's assistant. The friends who have offered creative and extraordinary measures of support or intervention. Strangers who sent gifts to invest into our Adoption Jar. All of it has been strategically placed in our path at His timing and by His grace to show us how very much He loves us. And how much He loves our Mei Mei.

Given the "mission" He's placed in my heart for my girl, I shouldn't be surprised that HIS plan for untangling the great big tangle of our yet-to-be approved I800 Immigrations process brought me right back to His love. His unchanging, all-consuming, new-every-day merciful love. It may be that I can only see it through that lens now, that it's almost completely untangled. But it's okay. He saw it and He knew what I needed in my journey to be able to see it too.

Sweet Give-Away Winner!!!

Good Morning all!  I'm excited to announce that Nicole from Living Out His Love is our randomly-selected winner of the Sweet Moon Baby book give-away. Her family's favorite adoption book is The Red Thread, by Grace Lin. That is a new title for me and one I'm sure I'll be checking out soon. Thanks, in fact, to everyone who shared their faves. I've got a whole list of recommendations to work with now as I build our family's library.

While I'm at it, if you haven't ever peeked over to my friend Nicole's blog, I highly recommend that you do so. She's a very gifted photographer and each time I visit her site, I'm amazed at the beautiful pictures she shares. She is also an adoptive momma who is home-schooling her three cutie pies, all while actively advocating for orphan care and supporting adoptive families in her network. I think you'll really enjoy cruisin' around her blog a little bit. Like she says, "grab a cup of coffee (or tea or whatever takes you to your happy place)...." and check it all out. For you readers who are local, you will especially want to look at her photography business. Tell her The Gang's Momma sent you to check things out!

Congratulations, Nicole!!!

I know you and your sweet little ones

will enjoy reading this tale together

for many years to come.

Love ya, girl!

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If you are interested in purchasing your own copy of Sweet Moon Baby, may I suggest  that you enter Amazon through my friend Robin's Amazon link. (Please click on that link to be taken there directly.) She's a fellow Living Hope momma and is sewing her way fast and furious to a darling little girl named Gabi Grace. Her partnership with Amazon benefits their adoption to this sweetie pie.

If you would like to connect with the author of Sweet Moon Baby and keep up on the success of this charming little book, you can "Like" their F@cebook page. Consider letting the author know what you think of the book once you've purchased it.

You are Cordially Invited...

My sweet friend Joslyn, strikes again!!!! Several weeks ago, I attended an Open House at her home, intending to pick up some new mascara for Lady Bug and myself, have some intelligent adult conversation and play with a bit of pretty jewelry. By the time the night was over, Joslyn had fully talked me in to hosting a big holiday event. And her friend, Karoline (of Premier Designs Jewelry) offered to join in. By the next day, we had two more home-based businesses on board and pretty soon, we were trucking! We've been busy all week gathering links, confirming participants and going live on Facebook.

I am so excited to unveil the big event here now, too. I'm even more excited to tell you that those of you who are not local to me can participate, too. Yes, it's true: You are ALL invited! You can also check out the "public event" here.

Isn't this invitation simply gorgeous? I'm always so impressed when folks can create graphic designs like this.  I'm also incredibly grateful for the time and effort that was put into this beautiful invitation and the support that each of these participants is lending to our event.

*********************************************

If you are here by way of the Christmas Frenzy linky event, thanks so much for stopping by. If you don't know what a Christmas Frenzy linky event is, stop by over there and check it out. And thanks to the Richards family for helping families get the word out!

If you have any questions or need more information, please feel free to contact me at the above email (which is also the email attached here to my blog. And if you are the praying sort, we'd appreciate your prayers for a successful event for all of us.

Where Have I Been?

We've had a great start to the school year! Li'l Empress gets up (mostly) happily every day, and practically skips her way through the morning routine. She's so pleasant and even the bus driver, Miss Lynne, commented on how she is enjoying Li'l E's sweet joyful demeanor. 

As far as we can tell, her adjustment to the bone-conduction hearing aide in the classroom setting has also gone well. Our hearing support teacher had me take pictures of the device and send them to her. She used the pictures to make a "cheat sheet" for all of Li'l Empress's teachers to reference. What a great idea, right?!  Li'l Empress also uses the portable FM system for in-class teaching time and is getting used to that along with her teachers. I get the impression that she doesn't love leaving her home classroom for specials (she told me yesterday that she cried in Art class because she likes Mrs. S's class room best) but I would expect that from most any Kindergartner and especially from MY kiddo - she's always more content with the familiar places that she knows Daddy or I have deemed "safe."  Both The Boss and I have been very pleasantly surprised by the easy acclimation to the new environment and routine. Compared to how she transitioned into last year at pre-school and then again this summer (to the new hearing aide) we were really expecting much more of a battle and a longer adjustment.

The older kids are all settling into their regular school routine pretty well. I think that having both Baby BlueEyes AND Li'l Empress on the same routine this year is really helpful this fall. I've seen a new level of maturity in BBE since school started, like he's growing into his role as Li'l E's primary touch point for both the morning routine and the bus ride. She calls him her "breakfast buddy" and her "bus buddy" and it's like he's preening in the attention. Tooo cute :)  Dr. D has turned into a serious morning person - up and moving and out the door almost before I can even get my stumbling self down the stairs. Must be all those early football camp days that formed a new habit!  And LadyBug gets herself up in time to perfectly coordinate her hair, make-up, and outfit for each day. Somehow in there she almost always finds time to eat and give the "big sister okay" to Li'l E's outfit, too. I have taken to keeping my bedroom door shut until my alarm goes off, to avoid the lights on in the hallway at the ridiculous hour she gets up to accomplish all that!

Shaggy has been working hard to organize his belongings and ready himself for his departure to Denver. When he's not working like a dog at Chick-Fil-A, he's sorting clothes, making lists, and cleaning his room. We've had some nice mornings here at the house together and it's going to be all.too.quiet. every morning once he's off to Colorado. There's a post about that coming but not now. I'm happy in my river of De Nial. :)

This week, he had a big chunk of time between shifts at work so he helped me sort over 14 bags and boxes of all kinds of baby paraphernalia, clothing, toys, and lots of other stuff for our fundraising efforts. So much stuff that I am actually doing another yard sale event.  I've been doing the F@cebook sales diligently all summer but the inventory was getting a tad stale. And in God's timing and provision, I got not one but TWO huge loads of donations that are almost all sure to be great sellers. (Both loads came from folks I barely know. How cool is that?!) Also in God's perfect timing, my new friend contacted me and offered to let me set up a bunch of stuff in her front yard at their neighborhood yard sale event.  I continue to be amazed at this gal's generosity, as well as the compassion and generosity of virtual strangers who just hear about our efforts and want to come alongside us and join in our purpose.  It's quite humbling.

 14 or 15 bins of clothing, most of them overflowing, 

from newborn sizes up through adult apparel.

Toys, strollers, bedding, home decor

We've got it all!

Join us in praying that it ALL goes, too!

The load of "Back to School" paperwork, before school even began, was overwhelming this year. I don't even want to look at Li'l Empress's IEP binder - it's a mess and totally unorganized after the scramble to close out her time with the Intermediate Unit, request a transfer from P.M. kindergarten to A.M., and amend her IEP for the coming school year. After all the phone calls and emails that the transition generated, I didn't want to touch the phone for a week! (Again, that stuff is a post in and of itself...)

I've been sorting, cleaning, purging, and organizing my way through bags and boxes and bins of STUFF. Lots and lots of stuff. It's always a huge chore to re-claim my home from the lazy hazy days of summer and this year the yard saling has added a huge new dimension to that. Somewhere in there we got to sneak away Labor Day with our friends, but that seriously feels like mooooonths ago already. We also had a big family wedding to prep for and sheesh, I forgot how much I hate school supply shopping. I sheepishly admit, we did not do one stitch of back-to-school clothing shopping this year. I just couldn't add one more thing in and really, except for sneakers that BBE seems to always need, the kids' wardrobes are fine for now.

And so, that's where I've been. August and now early September has been spent. Literally spent. Wrung out and hung to dry....  Which might explain why my blogging mojo feels like a wet dishrag.

I'm Under The Big Oak Tree!

Just wanted to mention to you all that my guest post at Under The Big Oak Tree is going live today.  I'd sure appreciate it if you'd stop over there and leave a comment. Surf around her site a bit. Check out some of her awesome recipes and menu ideas. And leave a comment. Take some time to look over the cool organizational tips and the weight loss challenge she has going on. And leave a comment.

Yes, please. Leave a comment. Encourage others to think about adoption. Cheer Alison on for being a voice for little ones who wait for mommas like me. Tell the other readers how much you love your Wild Olive tee. Tell them which one you've already ordered. Leave a comment. You get the idea!

And by way of updating you about our Wild Olive tees fundraising project, I wanted to say thanks to those who have ordered already. We are a little less than half-way to the crazy goal we set for ourselves. But we know that God loves to blast crazy goals out of the water. And the gals over at Wild Olive have graciously extended our sale to allow us to "go for it!" So we are!!!!!

If you are interested in purchasing your own Wild Olive tee, click on the pretty little button to the side of this post, the one that says "Help Bring Our Child Home." And when you get to the Adoption Fundraising Tees pages, put our family code (WHITNEY407) in the coupon code button at check out.

But first, go read my guest post at Under the Big Oak Tree. And leave a comment. Pretty please?!

Wordless Wednesday {refresh}

Waiting with bated breath.

That little button is gonna see a lot of action today.

For more Wordless Wednesday fun,

head over to 5 Minutes for Mom.

To find out if I was chosen as one of the three

GRAND PRIZE WINNERS of the 

2012 Mary Kay Get Beautiful and Give Back

make-over contest, come back here.

*Update: I didn't win. I'm sad. But I'll get over it.

Sigh. I really did think my story was more compelling

and very focused on the "Give Back" part of the contest.

Get Beautiful And Give Back {Correcting The Error}

My deepest apologies to anyone and everyone that has been trying to vote for me in the 2012 Mary Kay Makeover contest to "Get Beautiful and Give Back."

If you click on this link HERE, it should take you right to my gallery. Yeah, I'm the one with the splotchy red skin and red nose. And no, I was not drinking. Sigh. It's just me. And my rosacea.

Please be clear, you will be asked for your email address and to enter a verification code. Even if the instructions might say to leave a space between the "two words" in the verification codes, there is only one word, do not leave spaces.

I am so very, very sorry for the inconvenience. I've contact Mary Kay and my consultant and we are trying to track down the source of the other post's technical problems but this should be the fix you need for now.

Don't forget, you can vote 5 times a day, per personal email address. And you can share this post and the one I did earlier with folks to help them understand what I am doing. I'm working on making sure all the links work.

Thursday, I'll tell you about the charity I will be giving the winnings to, should I win. I think you will all agree it's worth fighting through the link failures to get to vote!

Again, my apologies. This is the link you need:

Get Beautiful and Give Back.

In Which I Humble Myself and Beg... Among Other Humiliating Activities

Those of you who are fortunate enough to know me in real life (ha, I'm feeling cheeky today!) know that I'm not really a glamour, diva, high-fashion kinda gal. I stick to a fairly simple routine of drying and pasting up the hair, medicating the rosacea (ugh), brushing a little bit of color on my eyelashes. I throw on my jeans and a tee, slide into my Nike flip-flops and I'm a happy gal. A happy gal with a minimalist's attitude about skin and make-up routine. But recently a bit of an opportunity dropped into my lap and I just have to share it with you.

Remember me telling you about the F@cebook yard-saling that I've been doing? Well, a gal saw some of my stuff and came over to purchase things for herself and her sister. We just clicked. She was intrigued by our adoption journey. When she heard about our "actual" yard sale, she donated a bunch of baked goods to the efforts. Man, did she make the baked goods! They sold out by the middle of Saturday morning, and I think Shaggy and Dr. D were her biggest customers.... as if I never feed them around here or something.

She contacted me to see if I'd be interested in a somewhat humbling creative opportunity to raise  funds for our adoption expenses. Seems that she is a Mary Kay consultant and thought I might enjoy entering their "Get Beautiful and Give Back" Annual Make-Over Contest.

Heh. See, she's a new friend and didn't really know about my aversion to a make-up routine.  But you know what? I did something pretty out of character. I said, "YES."

I said "Yes" to a make-over. I know. What on earth? I almost NEVER wear more than a touch of mascara. Occasionally I add a little eye-liner. But always, always, I stick to the browns and olives. Simple. No fuss. No muss. Matches everything. So I said yes.

THEN she gave me the rules. (She's a smart cookie, this new friend.) Allow her to photograph my "Before" look and my "After" look for the contest and write out a little description of why I enjoyed the Mary Kay make-over session. Then spread the word to win the most votes.

So. Now, I'm entered into the contest.

And now you have to vote for me.


Vote 5 times using your email address.
Then vote five more with another email address.
Or your mother's email address
(Kidding, I'm kidding... I used my husband's!)
Voting runs from noon (CST) on Tuesday, June 5th
through June 15th at noon (CST).


You can vote up to 5x per person, per day.
Click away, my friends, click away!

It's amazing to me the things we will do for our kids. I actually agreed to allow my completely-naked-of-any-products face appear on a nation-wide website. On the internet. All for the chance to win $2500 for our adoption journey. And $5000 for our favorite charity. Wow. What can I say? I love that little girl God is picking for us.

You have to help make the unveiling of my splotchy red embarrassed face and invisible eyelashes count for something. You have to. Please. I'm begging. Yes, that's right. BEGG.ING. I ain't too proud to beg. For heaven's sake, I've already bared my nekked face to the whole interwebby world. There's nothing left to be proud about.

Go. Vote. Tell others to vote, too. Just don't look too closely. Please?! Thankyouverymuch.

Gettin' Our Verse ON!

I am OVER DA MOON to announce that The Gang has been selected as a Wild Olive Tees Fundraising family!  It's no secret that I have LOOOOONG been a fan of this amazing, creative team of ladies that make the world more fashionable and more beautiful with artistic, meaningful tees. At last count, I currently own 5 or 6 of my own pretties and have given several as gifts to friends and family. I just can't get enough!

Ever since we began this journey to our girl, I've been anxiously waiting for the opportunity to partner up with this amazing company. I love their heart for orphans. I love their heart for adoptive families. And I love how they network with so many other wonderful organizations to support and care for the precious little ones who are in need all over the world. I hope that you will head over to their site and peek around their site for yourselves to read all about their mission and their passion. It will be time well spent. But do that after you stick around to read the rest of this post... Cuz it's about you.  Yeah. YOU.

Well, really, it's about how YOU can help us
in this grand adventure as a Fundraising Family.

First, you can head HERE (and only here on this page of the site, for it to count toward our efforts) and pick some tees out for you and your family. For your kids and your sisters. For your sisters' kids. Or maybe for your neighbors. Ooooh, and don't forget those end-of-the-year teacher gifts. Get creative, get crazy and have some fun spreadin' The Word. We'd be so incredibly grateful.

Just remember: When you purchase a tee, you MUST use our family code IN THE COUPON CODE option under the shopping cart. (That can be found in the pink tab to the right of the screen). You can also be sure the code is noted by entering it into the comment section (it's not necessary, but it's for added security when they are calculating orders). This code will not provide you with a discount. Rather, it will track sales that can be credited to the Whitney Family Fundraising efforts.

Are you ready?

The Family Code is WHITNEY407.

Got it? Goooood.

This button will take you directly to the page for the fundraising tees.

Second. you can feel free to help us spread the word about The Gang's efforts by sending this link to folks whom you think might love adoption.

Or whom might love really artsy, hip, and creative tees with GOD's Word on them.

Or whom might love The Gang.
(And really, who doesn't love The Gang? They are mighty cute, if you ask me.)
(And yes, I know I'm biased. But really. We have some seriously cute kiddoes.)

You can share the updates and links I'll be posting with folks in your neck o' the Facebook woods. You can contact me for other creative ways to help us get the word out, if you are interested. The sky is the limit. The world is your oyster. But only till June 29th. Then? Well, then the fundraiser is slated to be over.

Finally, you can pray. Pray, pray, pray. We are (as I mentioned in my post last week summarizing where we are in our journey to Brynna) more earnestly seeking the Lord for the specific file of the child HE has been preparing for our family. We are praying for financial provision (through this and the other jobs I have taken on during this journey). And we are praying for full-time, career-position employment for The Boss.

Our faith has been stretched in ways we did not envision in this season of our life. We are trying to stand strong; although it is indeed very stressful to switch from full-time corporate life to part-time, seasonal retail work. We know it's temporary, so we are making every effort to stay united and connected to each other and to The Father. It isn't easy and in fact, these last two weeks have been really, really hard. But we know He is in control. Of The Boss's job. Of this adoption. Of our future. And we are trusting Him for it. For all of it.

Thank you so much, in advance, for the prayer and the support.

We are truly blessed by all the love that we have felt in this season.

Now? Go. Get Your Verse On!

Looking for that "Flourishing Finish!"

We're trucking right along with our adoption journey to our Brynna Rose. In the last few weeks, we've received our USCIS approvals and we are now waiting for state seals and notaries from the Chinese Consulate. Our agency takes care of all that for us, which is a good thing considering the crazy schedule around here. I don't even know how we'd squeeze trips to the state capital and New York City in this month's calendar.

Once those seals are affixed to our dossier (that's the name for the big huge pile of paperwork that tells China's adoption program all about The Gang, inside and out!), then we will get a notification from our agency that we are "DTC." We can expect that notice in about two weeks. DTC (Dossier to China) means just that: our dossier will be winging its way to the governmental offices called the China Center for Children's Welfare and Adoption (CCWA). Within two to four weeks of our "DTC" date, we should be given an "LID" date. That means that the CCWA has received our dossier and has placed it officially in the waiting line for being matched. When we have an LID, we will be eligible to start poring over files from the Shared List. The Shared List has over 1900 children with varying ages and levels of special needs. This is the "pool" from which our agency will be searching for our match.

This link is an excellent resource for those of you who are unfamiliar

with the process of Chinese adoption. A couple of you have asked

for the "steps" we are taking and this site should help you

understand it far better than I usually can word it to you!

For now, we are looking at the smattering of files that are on our agency's site and checking out advocacy groups like Love Without Boundaries and An Orphan's Wish. We're not certain that our daughter is waiting on any of those sites, but it is helpful to get a working knowledge of the needs that are populating the lists and the exposure that the children are getting by these advocacy groups is phenomenal toward the cause of uniting them to their families. If you can handle looking at all those pictures of sweet little ones waiting for mommas and daddies, that is. Which, I usually can't. Sigh.

We are fairly certain that if we find a child on a site like one of these and we sense strongly that she could be our Brynna, our agency will work with us on the ins and outs of the process that would require. However, we also strongly feel that finding our girl will be all in His timing and His plan so we are trying to balance that as we do our research and look at all the sweet little faces out there.

Your prayers for wisdom, patience, and great discernment would be so appreciated. We want, more than anything else in this whole process, to be confident that He is leading the way to the final steps of this adventure. We want to remain submitted and alert to His nudges and His call in the search for our girl.

On Monday, I sent off a big check for the dossier fee and the balance in the adoption account dipped really low. I don't mind admitting that my faith wiggled and wavered a little bit when I saw that reduced balance. I mean, by far the biggest expense of this journey is still ahead of us. I know He has His hands all over this adventure we are on, so I threw back my shoulders, spoke The Word over my doubt that a dear friend suggested several weeks ago and moved on with my day.

"Every time you cross my mind, I break out in exclamations of thanks to God.

Each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. I find myself praying for you with a glad heart.

I am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us,

believing and proclaiming God's Message,

from the day you heard it right up to the present.

There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind

that the God who started this great work in you

would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing

finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears." ~ Phil. 1:3-6

We're so grateful for opportunities like this to build it back up. Please, feel free to share the site with your F@ceb00k friends and blogging community. It's a darling little book and I am proud to be connected with its mission.

You can get to the book's home site by clicking on the link on my sidebar, also. When ordering, and to make sure our adoption account gets the credit for your support, be sure to click on the "Personalize? How did you hear" link on the Shipping Address page. Enter "Whitney Family Adoption" and we'll get $5 for every book ordered.

An Update on The Progress

As I mentioned at the beginning of the month, January is our "big push" for paperwork as related to our second adoption journey.  I thought you might be interested to hear what we've been doing since the week following Christmas... Not the most exciting post I've ever written, but I'm LOVIN' all the little crossing off I get to do on my checklists. Prices of most documentations haven't changed all that much since we adopted Li'l E but now we have to include Shaggy in most of the process and maybe even Dr. D for some. Working on clarifying the answers for that but here's what we've done so far....

• Home Study Fee - It's sitting in Mei Mei's savings account as I type! Thank you, Jesus!
• Preliminary Questions Sheet - Done!
• Marriage Licenses - Both copies ordered and in hand already!
• Birth Certificates - All three copies are in hand.
• Proof of Training - Already submitted to agency and cleared.
• Prior Home Study - On file with the agency.
• Medical Forms - Kids are dropped off at the doc's office, waiting to be called for pick-up. Mine and The Boss's will be delivered to dr. at 4 p.m. this afternoon. Please pray about this one with us - we both are a tad concerned as our dr. wasn't the most compliant sort when we had to do this for Li'l Empress's journey. Twice. :(
• Financial Statements - Materials all gathered, waiting to be condensed onto worksheet today or tomorrow and then we need to print them...
• Police Clearances - Forms submitted on Friday. Think we might need to do one for Dr. D now too.
• Child Abuse Clearances - Forms submitted on Friday. Think this also needs to include Dr. D now.
• FBI Fingerprints - Form submitted and approval for appointment granted. The Boss is looking today for the nearest site so we can knock this off ASAP.
• Reference Letters - Sent out five to our closest friends and waiting to hear that at least 4 of the five have been returned. I forgot till now that one of them has to be from a teacher, since we have school-aged kids. Didn't know that detail when I got that done early in December so I'm fixing that today. Ugh.
• Proof of Medical/Health Insurance Coverage - The Boss is getting this done...
• Verification of Animal Vaccination - Really?! Ugh. Guess I'm going to the vet this week.
• Proof of Income - Easy peezy this time of year, letter of employment already in hand, forms being sent by CHOP soon.
• Verification of Debt - The Boss compiled that on Saturday. 
• Verification of Assets - Ditto. I need more ink for the printer before we can officially mark these two things done. Guess I'm going to Walmart while I'm out at the vet!
• Financial Worksheet - Ugh. Letting The Boss do this one too!
• Proof of Life Insurance Coverage - Copying from files, easy peezy, too.
• 6 Photos of "Everyday" Life - yeah, ummmm, really need to go get that ink!

Finally, we have our first "tentative" home-study appointment coming up at the end of the month. And the whole family meeting is scheduled for mid-February. We are hoping to make that the last of the four necessary meetings. But to schedule the other two in our agency's office, we're up against the challenge of coordinating The Boss's work demands, my babysitting obligations, and both Shaggy's and Dr. D's activities. Throw in the social worker's similar constraints and you can see the complications we foresee. But we will push through it and it will get done. I am determined!

Oooh, and in a bit of other fun family news, we think we finally have a name. I'm not sure yet how I feel about sharing it, as it is still kind of new to us and we are "trying it out" for a bit. But I will post more about that later. I promise!  How's that for another teaser?!

Wherein I Stop the Teasing

Okay, so last week I alluded to a thing I've been brewing up in my head. The recent conversations about adoption, finances, and fundraising have brought "this thing" to the forefront of my mind. I say the "forefront" cuz it's been tickling around in the back of my mind for quite some time now. In fact, really for about a year and a half now.

Are you all totally surprised that I kept something in my head for that long and DIDN'T do my regular verbal vomit of sharing-ness with you all?! Are you totally impressed with my thoughtful and self-contained processing?! I am. And I'm exhausted from it all, too. Sheesh. This discernment thing is hard work.

I am thinking of some ways to bring in additional income to The Gang's Headquarters to bolster up that little Adoption Jar of ours.

I mean, I can't sell much more on Cr@igslist. You know, The Boss kind of frowns upon selling the furniture and furnishings right out from underneath The Gang. He's not a big fan of sitting on the floor. Watching our 1998 era tv is painful enough for him.

And mind you, I am not eliminating the idea of a big fundraiser project at all. But I'm tabling it for this week and chatting this idea over instead.

The thing is?  I don't have a ton of work-in-a-traditional-office type of experience any more. I mean, I was a kick-butt awesome administrative assistant back before Shaggy was born. But that was 1994 and we were still using WordPerfect at our office. Heh. Remember that?

Plus, I have five gang members. Which makes my availability hard to nail down. What with football, band, ensembles, before and after school clubs, soccer, worship teams, lessons, and some half-day, three-days-per-week preschool thrown in for the fun of it. I'll let you do the mental math on that one.

So I'm thinking. And thinking.

In case you are new around here,

these italics and parentheses

are ME, thinking....

I love words. I love reading. I love writing.  And, (I haven't mentioned this to many folks before and certainly not here yet) I love editing. Proofing. Nixing commas left and right. Getting the PERFECT moment to insert a semi-colon.  You know, crazy stuff like that. Reading it again and then reading it out loud. I love it. If the story is really good, you know, like the ones that this amazing lady cranks out, then I am in word paradise. If it's not, then I am in editing Heaven while helping you get it there.

It's a sickness. I know.

Sigh. Can we move on now? Thanks.

So this is where you come in.... I think I might be interested in taking on some projects that might cushion that little Adoption Jar just a little bit more. I'm looking at essays, short stories, school papers, and resumes. Marketing brochures, presentations, or business flyers. College papers and research projects. You get the idea. Now, can you go share the idea?

I can work with you (or friends you might recommend) and make a rough draft into a final copy. I did it all school-year long, for the last I can't count how many school years with my older two boys. And I have to say, even if it sounds braggy, they got A's on all the projects I helped them complete. In fact, often (with the perks of cyber schooling) we were usually able to turn the rough draft into a final piece in just one or two steps that later saved them a separate lesson to complete and hand back in later. They liked that "skipping a lesson" thing pretty danged much.

I don't really have any other "professional credits" to be throwin' around here. I don't even know how "professional" I want a little beast like this to get. Certainly not a big suit-and-tie kind of monster. I do know that. But I'm asking nonetheless.

So. This is the post wherein I stop the teasing.

But it's also the post wherein I request your help. Wherein I ask you to consider throwing a girl some work. Or throwing the girl's name around where work might be generated.

I'm just sayin'...

To Fund Raise Or Not To Fund Raise?

Apparently, THAT is the question of late!

Recently, the hot button topic of adoption fundraising has been making its rounds in the forums, blogs, and even the newspaper columns again. Really, I tend to think its an issue that will never be settled.

If you check out this blog and its links and comments, you will see one perspective on the issue. It was hard to read. But I forced myself to read it all and think hard about the comments and the reactions that all sides of the adoption issue had to share.

And if you head over here, you'll see the exact same "Dear Abby" letter and a very different set of conversations happening about that issue (and frankly! an even broader perspective that wasn't adequately addressed at all in the original "Dear Abby" post). Not a ton of agreement, for sure, but again a challenge to me to think before I speak and really consider where I fall on the spectrum of beliefs and ideas.

(Kudos, Dawn, for targeting that additional conversation

that should have been handled much more

compassionately and realistically in the original "letter!")

I guess I had a lot more going on inside my head and my heart than I thought when I finally got around to reading and processing both blog posts and their comments.  Cuz look at what came pouring out of my fingertips after I'd read them both a few times and took some time to step away from it all and think it through.  Sheeesh, I feel like I just unloaded a ton of bricks from this old brain of mine.  I've re-posted my comments from the Creating a Family blog post, (I commented there mostly because I'm more familiar with Dawn and many of her regular readers).  What are you all thinking about these issues? I'd love to hear from you - but be sure to read the above links first.  It's worth it.

The way I see it, this discussion will never be agreed upon by those who camp strongly in the “adoption fundrasing is never right” and those who reside in opposite field of “adopt to save/rescue a poor little orphan.” Too many polarizing worldviews between them, methinks.

I am so torn, myself, frankly. I strongly resist the “adopt to rescue” mentality for myself and my Gang. Yes, we are born-again believers who will be raising all of our Gang in our belief system that says we all need Jesus. And without Jesus life is meaningless. BUT I don’t believe that proselytizing my faith should be the reason I work my hiney off to bring another sweet little girl into my home. We are gearing up for another adoption BECAUSE WE DON’T FEEL OUR FAMILY IS DONE YET. BECAUSE WE HAVE MORE LITTLE ONES IN OUR HEART TO LOVE AND WE WANT TO SEE THEIR LITTLE FACES IN OUR HOME. Period. In fact, I want it so badly that I am tearing up as I am typing this. In my view, it’s already been too long a wait for my next daughter.

Having said that, I will be the first to admit that we don’t have the necessary $24+K sitting around to do that. Granted, we have more tightening up to do. We have more debt-snowballing to finish. We have more STUFF to sell and more income to generate. (Anyone need some editing or writing work done?!) But if we wait till all those ducks are in a row to HAVE all that $$, we have several unwanted extenuating circumstances that will occur. Circumstances that are private. That are tender to a momma’s heart. That can be solved if we had the money sooner than later.

So we wonder. Can/should we fundraise? In my particular circles (church, special needs/adoptive moms), the vast majority say “Yes. Go for it. However we can help.” And I have some kickin’ good ideas (aaaah, that communications/public relations experience and degree are coming in handy now!) floatin’ around my head. Ideas that could turn into a great annual event that would possibly help us help other families build their families. Which is the second thing that I wonder about. When I do feel as if my family is “complete” (I hope sincerely that it is with this next one for whom we are working and waiting!), I wonder if I can parlay my passion to see kids find families into some fundraising and/or awareness support. I WANT to parlay my degree and my experience and my passion into something that creates permanent and loving change for kids and parents.

Which brings me back to the fundrasing… If it is done rightly, without the “save my child, the pitiful orphan” focus; if it is done with integrity and with a sincere effort at helping folks build families, what on earth is so wrong? I know, I am not an adoptee and I don’t fully understand the implications for how it might make them feel. But really? Shame on the folks who would allow that message to settle over their adopted child! That would allow lies and wrong motives to attach themselves to their child’s psyche without swooping in with loving TRUTH of the matter. When I hear a lie, any distortion of truth spoken to or about my child’s life (any of my children!), I correct it.

I don’t know. I don’t have the answers. And I’ve never laid out my thoughts or heart about fundraising and adoption quite this publicly before. I fully realize that I am likely speaking in great niavete. Sigh. I am just a Momma who loves her kids. Those here in my gang’s headquarters and those not yet home. And frankly, most days, I feel like I will do anything I have to to get my next mei-mei home where she can be loved and doted upon like Li’l E is. Even if I make major faux pas along the way.

Which, I fully recognize I am likely already doing. Another sigh.

The Wrecking Continues...

Thanks for the tip, Kateri! I had no idea there was a "part two" to the story from yesterday's post.

"Many are the plans in a person’s heart,
   but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails." ~ Proverbs 19:21

I Am Wrecked

This video clip was the opening to the final session of the Financial Peace University classes that The Boss and I have been taking at our home church.  Though I had seen it before, this time around, it had quite a different effect on me.

It wrecked me for the rest of the night.

Heck, it's Friday and I still feel wrecked.

There is a lot that The Boss and I feel in our hearts that God has for us and for our commitment to live debt-free.  It's been a long road and we've made some great progress.  It's been very humbling to see the freedom that our healthy choices are affording us now. But, being very honest, in the course of the 13-week classes, it's also been very discouraging at times. Thinking about the foolish things we did that landed us in this position. See, before we moved to our current community, we were almost debt-free. We had been living on a strict budget, we were choosing wisely how to spend and it was working well for us. When we moved, we lost our focus. We lost our motivation. It only took a few years of living mindlessly to create the mess.

We've been working (mostly) diligently to fix the mess and restore our finances to integrity for almost 4 years now. It's been a long four years and many times during these 13 weeks, I felt like the topics didn't connect to our current situation. Like we would never "get there." Hanging in there till the end of the series was an act of obedience for me and the last session totally framed, for both The Boss and I, just WHY we needed to take the class (even though we were already living most of the principles of the program).  It was just the shot in the arm that I needed to keep living with the strict guidelines and a plan in place.

Cuz, guys?  The last session was basically this:

It's All HIS.

I am just a manager.

When I hold it all loosely in my hand,

I am free to do with it what HE wants me to do.

Nothing terribly new or revelatory in that. Nothing we haven't known for these past four years. In fact, these past four years, we've worked hard on our finances and re-ordered our home to live according to that very principle. But again, with that video clip opening the whole summation of the series, it hit me differently when I I heard it this time.

See, that couple in the video that received the trampoline and the very large check to pay off debt?  I'm not gonna lie - in this particular stage of my life, while waiting and waiting for mei-mei and longing for the day that I can start throwing around all the acronyms and initials of adoption again? I would LOVE to be the recipient of a gift like that. Of an investment by another godly couple into my family.

But really?  Far beyond the addition of our family by the next adoption that we are waiting on God to engineer  in His timing and plan?  Far beyond the "knowing" when our family is complete and resting in that sense of being "done"?  In my heart of hearts, I want to us be that couple that gave. I want to be such an excellent manager of HIS resources in our home that I can hear His voice prompting us to come alongside another family who is waiting for their own mei-mei. I want to share the blessings from His hand with my neighbors. I want to be a giver who invests in other families freely, generously, and without thought to "how I might afford it." I want to live in such a way that His resources flow through my hands, in ways that will build His people. That will build His kingdom.

Yeah, that video wrecked me. But the wrecking has been going on for a while now. And I am praying that it keeps on wrecking me - till His work for me is done.

"Every time you cross my mind, I break out in exclamations of thanks to God. Each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. I find myself praying for you with a glad heart. I am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us, believing and proclaiming God's Message, from the day you heard it right up to the present. There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears." ~ Philippians 1:3-6 (emphasis mine)

Linking Up

Okay, so there's some good stuff out there in bloggy land that I have finally gotten around to reading and processing.  With all the focus on "taking back my territory" and our "potty boot camp" around here, I'd gotten quite behind on reading my favorite blogs and websites.  Some of this will be new to you, some of it won't. But if you're looking for a good read while your little ones are napping or watching B@rney, here you go!

Supermoms R Us - made me want to stand up on a chair and cheer for Christie. That girl's got a way with the words.

one question answered - Stefanie tackles the question of affording adoption. Rather, she tackles the question of what your priorities are if you desire to afford adoption. Good stuff. But guard your toes - the truth might step on the little piggies a wee bit.

Why I feel Weird When People Ask How We're Doing - my adventurous and honest friend Stephanie tackles the "questions" and the question-ers.  Was a great reminder to me to only ask if I really want to know, and be really willing to hear the answer and LISTEN with my HEART for what a friend might be saying within the words. This does NOT pertain just to adoption, but that's what Stephanie is currently adjusting to.

Burdened - also by my friend, Stephanie, this post makes me wonder how many of us are really broken-hearted over the things that break God's heart. How many of us cry over the things that make Him cry?

I've Been Summer Schooled - Classic Mama is wise beyond her years, and the two-part post is giving my creative juices a run for their money.  Her great idea is a huge bonus for all of their family.  Plus, it's always fun to have a fellow-potty-training mommy with whom to commiserate.

how do you know? - This is a beautiful description of the many ways, within one family, that the Lord worked to reveal the next child to be added to the clan. A walk down memory lane for the mama and a great example to us of being open to God's creative plans. If you are not a regular reader over at the blog of No Hands But Ours, you really should be. It is a timely resource and I'm learning so much from the other folks who post there regularly.  I could list link after link after link that has made me investigate my parenting style and my views on adoption and special needs.

That's a smattering of what I've been reading this week, while housebound and potty training. I have to say, I had forgotten in the years since Baby BlueEyes learned his potty skills how hard it was to be home and focused on this big task. But the laundry is caught up, I've stayed on top of the dish piles that magically appear each time Shaggy or Dr. D meander through the kitchen, and I've gotten some brainstorming and planning done for summer.

What are you reading? What links have captured your thoughts and challenged you this week? Really, I want to know!!!!

Adoption Tax Credit Changes!

Those of us in the adoption community know very well the often difficult financial obligations of bringing home our kids. Whether domestic or international, building your family through adoption is NOT an inexpensive venture.  One of my favorite sites, Creating a Family, just posted some important tax information.  It's not information that's been talked about much in the news lately. But it seems that the Adoption Tax Credit has been revised.  AND made retro-active, too.

Go here for information that can help you sort out whether or not you are eligible for additional refunding.  It might take a few minutes of researching, but given the increase of up to one thousand dollars, I think it'll be worth your time!

Thanks Dawn, for keeping up with all the information like this that furthers the cause of adoption!  You rock!