Bloom Where You Are Planted {Grandma Rose}

Today, my Grandma Rose went home to be with Jesus, to worship Him forever alongside of the love of her life, my Grandpa Sam. She had a long, full life and I was so very blessed to call her my grandmother.

Grandma Rose was born in the midst of some very hard, spare years in both America's story and her family's story. She was one of 7 children and lost her mother at a very young age. She grew through the years into a beautiful young woman with a gentle and kind spirit. She caught the eye of my Grandpa Sam at a young age and their love story is one that I had tremendous privilege to see in person, even well into their final years together.

As I sit and process her passing, the memories are tumbling. 

Snippets of the great tenors and Italian arias wind through my mind. 

Smells of deep red marinara sauce and fried chicken cutlets come alive. 

Her incredibly soft arms are brushing mine while I sit next to her at the table,

listening to the loud, boisterous laughter between the aunts, uncles,

cousins, in-laws and "outlaws" that were always welcome at their table. 

Thanksgiving feasts of turkey, stuffed shells and lasagna 

spread along the two long tables in their basement.

Sitting at her old-fashioned dressing table, pretending to be 

a grown-up "fancy" lady while playing with her hats, pins, and pearls.

Perhaps one of my favorite memories that I replay the most often, even now, is one that took place in her kitchen almost every time I was with them. Grandpa Sam used to pretend to spar with her as she washed the dishes or folded kitchen towels. He was a huge boxing aficionado and he would dance around her, punching the air and saying "Come on, Ro! Have a go with me. Give me your best shot." Her blushing brush-offs and sweet, almost embarrassed and yet tolerant smiles brought me such peace and enjoyment as a kid. Even at that young age, I remember LOVING how they brought us in to their love story with his winks at me when he snuck up on her in the kitchen. With how she rolled her eyes when I would giggle at her "Oh, Sam" responses. As an adult (now that I've learned so much more of their story before they became the patriarchs of this big family we are now), I see so much more. I didn't know it then though. I didn't know how much those moments would come to mean. I just knew I felt loved. By watching their love. 

Grandma Rose wasn't one of those hot-house roses, fragile and easily overcome by the elements. She wasn't green-house born and raised, withering easily for lack of water or care. No, my Grandma Rose was a Knock Out Rose. Yes, she was a beautiful woman. A knockout as they said back in the day. But I'm talking about these beauties. Knock Out Roses are known for their full, lush blooms and for being very low maintenance. They don't require specialized care, perfect soil or optimum sunlight to thrive. They are drought-hearty and their roots spread wide, allowing them to spread and grow well in almost any place they are planted. They bloom where they are planted and then some.

My grandmother was that variety of woman that bloomed regardless of her surroundings. She had a hard childhood. A really hard one. She and her siblings were forced to cling tenaciously to each other, to intertwine their roots and hang on for dear life. And hang on they did. Back then, there was very little special care available to that scrappy immigrant family. They just had to dig in and do life together. When they married, she welcomed my grandfather's even larger family as her own. Together, along with her siblings and his, their love and commitment crafted even deeper roots and lush, full family trees. Their tenacity yielded our close-knit, loving extended family. It was, as I've said before, a wonderful way for a child to grow - connected to generations before me.

Grandma Rose wasn't as loud and boisterous as others in our family were. Usually, she'd be found working quietly in the kitchen, watching the kids playing in the yard from the window over her sink. Or quietly joining the conversations from her spot behind the long counter. She was gentle. Soft-spoken. Humble. Honest. The perfect straight-woman to Grandpa's light-hearted antics. She was steady. Reliable. Comfortably predictable and constant. Along with my Grandfather, her quiet, persevering root system spread its life to three beautiful daughters onward to 10 grandchildren and now to 19 great-grandchildren. Those blooms are beautiful and plenteous and growing still.

We didn't know it when we named her, but our little Mei Mei's personality couldn't really be more opposite from the great-grandmother for whom she is named. But I DID know that the beauty of a Rose, that the joy and life it gives, takes many different varieties so it felt like the perfect fit at the time. In the years since Mei Mei has been home, I've learned that my grandmother and her little namesake share some very similar hard beginnings to their stories. Difficulties that my grandmother overcame and used as a root system to build the life she shared with my grandfather. My grandmother's story and my daughter's story began worlds and generations apart from one another. Nevertheless, their roots are deeply intertwined now. That is the miracle of family, is it not? It is my dearest dream that our Mei Mei will push that root system even deeper, spread it further, and continue the legacy of beautiful, plenteous blooming. That she will carry her name proudly and feel rooted to the heritage into which she is now grafted. No matter the hardships she has faced or will face as she grows.

For several years now, my best friend has been suggesting to me that I fill the front garden with Knock Out Roses because nothing else has grown well there. This Spring, I will do that. I will plant several rose bushes in honor of The Knock Out Rose that my Grandma was. I will remember and I will tell my children that so very often the most beautiful blooms come out of the hardest of hardships.

Good bye Grandma Rose. Thank you for your gentle, loving ways.

Thank you for digging in and doing the hard stuff and creating

this beautiful family we love. Give Grandpa Sam a huge hug for me.

And maybe just a fun, soft little punch in the arm.

I know you have it in you! I love you.

My Tapestry

See that babe in arms? That's my Uncle Johnny. He passed away yesterday, leaving a legacy of kindness, gentleness, and love of family. He was the last of my grandfather's siblings to pass away, the youngest son in a big, loving, Italian family.

Of course, none of them were perfect, but every single memory I have of these great-uncles and great-aunts is just that: GREAT.

Outbursts of laughter around overloaded tables.

Good-natured teasing and bickering.

Stories of stark but happy childhood.

Bear hugs & kisses until you were gasping for breath.

And yes, food. LOTS and LOTS of food at every single gathering.

OH! THE! FOOD!

Not a bad way to grow up. Not at all.

By now, you all know I'm hopelessly sentimental when it comes to matters of family and legacy. Uncle Johnny's passing has provoked a myriad of memories all rife with emotion today. Anchoring all of those feelings is an overwhelming gratitude, I'm so incredibly grateful for the great big tapestry that both sets of my grandparents' generation wove for me and my generation.

This tapestry has been many things

for many people in our family.

A work of art, giving testament to the family's status and standing in society. A witness, if you will, of that which they have achieved together.

A rich backdrop, giving color, depth, and texture to our collective coming story as new immigrants to this country. Bringing their history to their present.

A thick and stable rug to stand upon, when building a life together. A plush but firm "take your stance" kind of setting point.

A soft landing place, a net of sorts that was wide and secure into which they could fall when hard times rocked them off their feet.

A warm wrap into which they could burrow when life felt cold and brutal.

Today, we mostly think of intricate tapestries as works of art to be hung on a wall. But a true family-woven tapestry wasn't always meant to be just gazed at and admired. Admittedly, we aren't as familiar with the many uses that a hand-woven, artfully crafted tapestry can have in today's world. We don't need one piece to do all those things anymore. We have Wayf@ir for rugs and T@rget for sweaters, right? But if you look back in history, family tapestries had many functions beyond their artisan beauty.

It strikes me that my family tapestry has both beauty and function that is sadly becoming more and more rare in this culture in which we live. I'm proud to declare that I will stay anchored to both families who wove this tapestry before me. I will continue to teach my children well in the art of weaving their rows to grow it strong and beautiful for generations to come.

********************************

Uncle Johnny, say hi to Grandpa Sam for me. Enjoy your reunion and your time to worship Jesus to the strains of heavenly Italian opera with him. You are missed here. All of you.

Moments. {two weeks}

It turns out, I was right in feeling {unprepared} for all that the last two weeks have held for this gang. Until you've lived through something like this, there's really no way you can fully prepare for the experience. EVEN if you have the most awesome support network of "been there done that" mommas sharing their experiences and advice. EVEN if you have an amazing crowd of friends and family praying you through and supporting you practically and emotionally. Which, I am so grateful to say, I do. But still. {unprepared} I was.

I'm not gonna lie. These last two weeks since Mei Mei's surgery have been hard. The day of the surgery, frankly, was likely the easiest of the days that we had while IN the hospital. (We waited. She slept. And oddly, I only felt momentary flashes of nervous anxiety over her care or well-being. SO. SO. grateful for that.)

And just this past Saturday we finally experienced the easiest day-into-overnight since we returned home from our four day stay. In between those good days, we've crammed all kinds of hard moments. Sleepless nights. Night terrors. Temper tantrums. Pain management gone awry. Lost patience. Ugly behavior. And not all of it was Mei Mei.

But in between those good days, we've also crammed a lot of really great moments. Those are the moments on which I am (sometimes hourly) choosing to focus. Those are the moments that the Lord uses to swing my eyes back to HIM and HIS perfect plan for Mei Mei. For our family. It's an act of discipline, this choosing to focus. Especially at this time of year.

Mei Mei got the honor of placing the first ornament
on her first-ever Christmas tree. Yes, I cried.

I could (and am sorely tempted to) stress over the anger and aggression that comes bubbling up out of her in those difficult moments. I could keep looking at that "holiday To Do list" that isn't getting smaller any time soon and despair of ever finishing it in time. I could sink into the flashing moments of Mommy-guilt and inadequacy, wallowing in the fear that I'm not meeting the needs of the other gang members, in the every day and in the fervor of the holiday. I could, I could, I could. And really, I've struggled NOT to.

But then there are these other moments. These moments when HE comes to me and whispers to my heart. Snippets of Scripture memorized as a child. Refrains of songs and hymns buried deep in my heart. I've said it before but it bears repeating. In these moments, I am so incredibly grateful for parents who trained me in The Word. Who taught me to seek His face in good and in bad moments. Who encouraged me and lived out the example that joy comes NOT in the circumstances but in the confidence and security of being HIS CHOSEN CHILD. It has carried me well in these last two weeks.

First cookie decorating party ever! Not sure how much icing went on the cookies.
Last year, only 3 of our kids were home for this tradition.
This year, The Gang was ALL here. Yes, I cried.

I am convinced, in all of these moments, both hard and healing, that the prayers of the Body of Christ carried us. I am convinced that His Word is powerful and full of Truth that rises above the difficult moments. I am convinced, now more than ever, that HE HAS CHOSEN ME for this time. For this child. For even in those moments where I feel like I'm failing miserably at all of it, He speaks to me. In those moments when I wonder if my inadequate and all-too human response to my daughter's broken-ness is doing more damage than good, He offers me HIS response.

It's those moments when I get the second wind to go just a little deeper into her heart. It's those moments when I get a fresh fire to escort her to the healing He has for her. Those moments, even the hardest of moments, I remember that they are just that: moments. By definition, moments (both hard and exultant) are fleeting. He is not. He holds those moments. Each and every one of them.

A Happy Mother's Day, Indeed.

What a wonderful Mother's Day weekend I had with my gang! The Boss's folks came in for a long weekend on Friday afternoon. His sister and her family came in Saturday afternoon. Everyone wanted to meet Mei Mei. It was LadyBug's 14th birthday {sigh. sob.}on Sunday. So we celebrated all three big events together. All weekend long. We ate. We laughed. We watched the kids play together. We ate some more. And I got the exquisite joy of having all 6 of my kids home, together, for the first Mother's Day ever. Knowing that our Gang is now complete, that we are, indeed, "all here" added such a sweet note to the day. I am a blessed momma.

Getting a picture of me and my three girlies

proved almost to be my undoing.

I bought the matching dresses for the little ones

at Gift From China on Shamian Island.

The pictures are not doing the

utter cuteness any justice at all...

I guess that's to be expected with a 22-month old

who moves faster than any shutter speed I know!

LadyBug with her yummy chocolate cake

and the delicious coconut cupcakes from my sweet friend, Kateri.

NO ONE on the planet makes coconut cake

(and cupcakes) like this woman can.

Seriously.

Mei Mei completely agrees.

She sucked the icing off that cupcake

faster than I can even SAY cupcake.

And was so sugared up she practically ran

circles in the kitchen.

If she had a tail, she'd have been chasing it!

LadyBug and her bestie cousin, Alyssa.

They are about a year apart in age.

This is one of the rare sitings of them during our weekend

visit. We always joke that as soon as they get together,

they disappear for the entire visit, whispering and talking together

and catching up on all their girl talk!

Happy Momma with all my gang.

All together. At last.

I just love these kids of mine.

LadyBug has a frame that she likes to keep

filled with a picture of the two of us.

She asked for an updated picture while the camera was clicking.

Now that I see this, I might have to go into the archives

and find one from her chubby little baby days.

This one is giving me a heart attack.

Hope your Mother's Day was beautiful and memorable.

One Week

Wow. It's been a full week with our girl today. I can hardly believe it. On the one hand it feels like yesterday that this dream was just that - still a dream. And on the other, it feels like she's been with us forever. She's doing really well in the days since we met. She's very independent and opinionated but I am more so, so I am confident that I can out last that to teach her healthy dependence and loving relationship.

Remind me of that when we've been home awhile

and she's still not "getting" that the tantrums on the floor

don't wash with Momma. Heh.

Yesterday I was talking with Lily about why we were spoon-feeding an almost two year old, explaining that we were trying to "re-wire" her brain and her heart for a new understanding of "family." We want her to eventually grow to be a strong, confident woman who is able to care for herself fully, but we want it to come from the right place. A place of strength and healthy identity. Given the director's descriptions of how the healthy, capable children in the orphanage are encouraged to care for themselves, we want Mei Mei to know that she doesn't HAVE TO care for herself right now. That she has Momma and Baba and a bunch of big siblings who will help her and support her. We want her to be released from self-reliance and survival mode and live in the freedom of healthy dependence, healthy reliance on the people God has given her in this new life. Our intention is that this path will lead her to more fully and more easily trust in the unseen Father to provide all she needs.

Indeed, it is some big aspirations and hopes, but we know that God equips us and sustains us and we look forward to showing her and telling her in the years to come that HE is our source and our strength. I consider it an honor and privilege to be able to parent yet another little gift in the ways my parents taught me. I'm not sure that they ever dreamed that they'd have now 16, soon to be 17 grandbabies learning the lessons that they taught the four of us but isn't that the awesome thing about God's economy? He more than multiplies the blessing when we walk in His favor. I am so grateful that The Boss and I both come from a heritage of faith as the bedrock of our homes.

This adoption trip-hotel home-visit China bubble won't last much longer and I'm trying to enjoy it while I have it. When I think back to how long it took last Sunday for her to trust us enough just to change her diaper, and how sad her face was all that day and the next, I'm really humbled that I get to be part of her healing process, of her blossoming into the little girl God created her to be.

I wasn't laughing at her pain, honest.

I just couldn't get over how much hair she had.

One layer of clothing off, about three more to go.

Poor little thing was just so tense and stressed.

And sweaty. So, so sweaty.

We see her opening up a little more every day and what a privilege it is to be a part of that process. Her eyes are clearer, her smile comes very readily, and she's completely comfortable, even a little naughty (in a completely cute, impish sort of way!), in allowing us to care for her, even in her most vulnerable state. Our learning curve with her medical issues has been a bit steep but we are getting the hang of it and she's so far been very patient with us, now that she's not so wary of what we are doing.

Her health seems to be quite improved from our first day or two together. She is no longer coughing and rattling in her chest when she breathes. Her nose has stopped running and her color is excellent. In fact, we've had quite a few comments about her beautiful skin tone. She's pretty fair-skinned and her hair is very dark brown with only a few shades of jet black. Yesterday in the van, we were commenting that it's actually very similar in shade to Li'l Empress's hair. The texture is NOTHING like her sister's, leaning more toward thick and coarse than Li'l E's hair.

It's amazing to me, even having done this once before and having seen scores of friends experience the same journey, just what an incredible difference LOVE makes. What a treasure it is to be part of that, to have my own heart expanded yet again to take in this love that she is learning to give. Looking over this past week, I am brought low by the gift of being Momma to this gang of mine. All 6 of them.

One week later, Mei Mei was too busy waving to every passer-by

to smile for Baba's camera, as we walked through an ancient

Hutong village of Beijing.

A post on that tour will come later!

Happy Easter, belated

Happy Easter, a day belated. We spent the holiday with family... there's no better way to spend it, especially given all the big changes coming for us all in the coming weeks and months.

There was a great children's program at the start of both services, in which Shaggy did some puppeteering with some other teens to tell a unique version of the real meaning of Easter. Interspersed by a couple songs in which Li'l Empress' class participated. Oh, so cute! She sang with super gusto, every single word, during the first service. But then during second service, she was so focused on being ready for her "job" of holding up the sign at the right time that she completely skipped singing the words. CRACKED us up!

Then, my Pastor BIL invited our gang forward to pray for us and launch us off on our trip to Mei Mei. It was a sweet moment, feeling the covering of our church family and the love that they have for us and for our girl. The little sigh of delight when they flashed her picture, in both services, made me totally tear up. Again!

After services, we headed off to the mountains to spend time with my family and enjoyed a yummy meal followed by deadly, decadent desserts. Orange Coconut Cake. Cadbury Creme Egg Brownies. Angeletti cookies. Sigh.... we all sunk into a sugar coma shortly after the meal was cleared and dishes cleaned.

I have no pictures of that. It's to protect the guilty. Heh. And let me tell ya, on the dessert front, we were all pretty darned guilty!

Hope your holiday celebrations with your family were lovely. I'm so grateful for friends and family that share the joy of celebrating His Resurrection. And for the love that changes everything.

This Momma's Heart

I've said it before and I'm sure I'll say it again. My happiest days are the ones where my family gathers together to celebrate. This time, we were celebrating Baby BlueEyes. Who turned ELEVEN on Friday. Yes. Eeeeee.LEV.EN! How on earth did that happen. I can't believe it. Which is trite and redundant because every mom says it, but it's true. I can't believe he's 11 already. This momma's heart was brimming all day at the true gift our boy is to us all.

We had a huge pasta dinner and some yummy pumpkin spice cake with cream cheese frosting. It's his traditional favorite and of course, seasonally super appropriate. He got some awesome gifts and then we took some time to share what we all individually loved about him. Oh, my momma's heart was overflowing... Such loving, encouraging, and character-strengthening things were said to and about my little guy.

Another part of the gathering was for the family to spend a bit of time with Shaggy before he leaves next Sunday (sigh.sob.) for his YWAM experience. My sister left her two oldest boys here overnight with my folks to allow the older cousins some hang out time. And again. Oh, my momma's heart... Somehow, these kids all got grown up on us. But what fun to see their friendships deepening and and taking on a life of their own. I got the biggest kick of just sitting back and observing their interactions together. It's especially meaningful knowing that this season of their lives represents so much change and transition. I love that they have similar, concrete foundations to come back to and to build upon together as they continue to grow and discover the path God has for them. They will always have each other and I'm tears-at-the-back-of-my-throat grateful.

If you are thinking of the Gang in any way this week, we'd ask that you remember us in prayer. First, the next release of the Shared List is scheduled for this Monday, the 24th. We'd sincerely love for our Brynna to be found on this month's list. This momma's heart deeply desires for Shaggy to be a part of the process of adding a sister to the mix as much as possible. At the same time, I'm also trying to remember that HE knows my heart and HIS plan will unfold in HIS timing.

And speaking of Shaggy, we could all use your prayers in these final days of having him home. Shaggy is ready to move on to this season of his life. We are confident that he is ready, we are grateful for, and proud of, (is that cheeky to admit?) the training and work we've done to help him get ready. We know, if only in small part, that the many years of molding and shaping his character and stewarding his heart for the glory of our Father have led to this week. 

But this momma's heart is no longer swimming happily in the river of De Nial. This momma's heart is starting to grieve the reality of long weeks between super great bear hugs and thoughtful late night conversations. This momma's heart is freaking out at the idea of days without any chatting or checking in. I'm not okay right now. No, I'm a blubbery mess. And I'm not even trying to hide it anymore. So, if you ask me this week how I am, I might not have a lot of words. But you might want to have a tissue on hand. I will need it, I'm fairly sure.

This momma's heart will be okay. I know it, just as I know this is what He created me to do - to ready my Gang for the world and the calling God has wired into each of them. I knew that the journey would be long and hard. I just never pictured it being so.danged.hard. to actually do. And it's still a week away.

More Partying than Olympic Village!

I'm back. Did ya miss me? I've been soaking in family time and getting my love tank filled to overflowing by hosting my side of the family for the weekend. We planned a big get together just to celebrate our family and the great things God is doing in and through all of us.  It's becoming a bit of an annual tradition that we enjoy, usually in August since we have soooo many August birthdays.

I wish I had thought to snap some "Before" and "After" pics of the refrigerator and pantry to show you all. Use your imagination when I tell you that I prepared well for the 25 bodies that descended upon our home for a family Sunday of grilling and swimming and hanging out. Here's the spread we all put together for Sunday dinner.

And that most of those same bodies came back again on Monday. D*min*e's Pizza was running a special for on-line ordering so I chose that option for the evening meal and made it easy on all the mommas. My poor dishwasher ran 4 times on Monday alone, even with paper plates and disposable utensils!

Sigh. I've said it before and I'll likely say it again. Those are THE.BEST.DAYS. of the year to me. THE.BEST. bar none.

Are these not the best looking kids ever?! We're so numerous now that we had to have one table for the teens, one for the "youngers" and one for the adults!

2012 has already been quite a milestone year for just our family here in the Gang's household, but it's also been a big one in many respects for my whole side of the family. Big moves from state-to-state, new jobs, graduations, missions trips, retirements, and other big life changes to celebrate in addition to the birthdays. I'm so grateful to navigate those changes and this journey with them.

And it certainly didn't hurt that we gathered to celebrate our family around big platters of juicy steak. Mmmm, steak.

46 Years and Counting

Today is my parents' 46th anniversary.

I am blessed to be a part of their legacy of love and faithfulness and intentional choices to stick it out through thick and thin. Honoring God, honoring each other, and honoring the family God gave them was, is, the culture in their home.

At the risk of sounding prideful, you can see it now in the homes of all four of their kids.

And you can see it in the lives that the grandchildren are living now, too.

I am so grateful for their example.

Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad.

May God Bless You with many, many more

days to keep living for Him.

My Mission

Whew. I am finally recovering from the insanity of the last ten days.  Here at The Gang's house, we've had some of the craziest happenings we've ever experienced in just this one 10- day time period.

Shaggy had his first car accident. He's fine. But the car isn't. So Momma is back on taxi duty. For his job, for Dr. D's football lifting schedule, and for all the other stuff that The Boss can't help with when he's at his part-time job.

The Boss has had several interviews and is working lots of hours at his part-time, fill-in-the-blanks job. He's also managed to finish his part of Baby BlueEyes' room and knock some random little jobs off his "Honey Do" list. Today, he's starting Li'l Empress's new room. We are getting SUCH a kick out of how cheaply we are able to transform these rooms.  Really, it's a sickness, I think.

Baby BlueEyes' room is all but done. A few pictures to hang and voila! I also have to find a bulletin board and a couple lampshades. A big reveal post should be coming soon. If it stops raining and I can get out to my local B!g L@ts on the way to Shaggy's night shift, that is....

Li'l Empress has successfully and even cheerfully navigated the change from her tiny, cozy little room to the bigger room she will eventually share with Brynna. She experienced a couple bumps but a smooth transition over all. Even after we moved BBE over into his new room and she re-adjusted to sleeping in a room alone again.

The Boss chaperoned a trip with BBE to historic sites around Philly with the whole 4th grade. He did it with the older kids too and I'm so, so grateful that they had a safe, fun time. When I asked BBE what the best part of the day was, he replied, "Seeing the Rocky statue." Ugh. That SOOOO would not be my answer!!!!

We had a big "Happy 13th" birthday party here for LadyBug. I took it easy on myself with the crazy schedule I've been keeping and just ordered pizza. You'd have thought THAT was her gift, she was so happy to consume pizza with her cousins!

LadyBug had not one but THREE major concerts in less than a week. (Really, what is UP with that?! THREE IN FIVE DAYS!) The final one was a competition with the organization called Music in the Park and was outstanding! Both sets of grandparents got to hear her ensemble perform, which was such a treat for all of us.

The best part of the competition is that the day included a trip to Dorney Park. It was the actual day of her 13th birthday and I chaperoned the trip. It was fun hanging out with her and her two friends. Such sweet kids. At the end of the day, there was an awards assembly and her ensemble won both categories that they were entered into, resulting in some pretty neat trophies.

My on-line yard sale is still running, but it has slowed down a bit so I've been creating some sales and incentives and trying to get creative with moving all that stuff out of my garage and into someone else's home.

Today, I've set aside the day to reclaim the counter-tops from the flowing piles of paperwork. So far, I've accomplished the following, all before I ate my late breakfast:

• updated my freezer inventory
• planned about 1/2 of the meals we need for the remainder of the school year
• made a rough grocery list
• updated all my sale sites on FB and on craigslist
• cleaned off the front of the fridge

Man, I hate the cluttered mess that my fridge and my counters become when things are busy here - scraps of notes and reminders all over the place. It makes ME feel scattered and phrenetic.

I call it reclaiming my territory. This time around, it really felt like the land was taken over by crazy alien invaders and I had to go in with a conqueror's mentality. Slaying the dragon of chaos. Vanquishing the enemy of order and peace. Restoring order to the kingdom.

Yup, today it's all about recovery. That's my mission and considering the condition of things around here, I have no choice BUT to accept it!

Because It Bears Repeating

I love Valentine's Day.

I said it last year.

And I'm saying it again.

I love the proliferation of hearts and flowers that take over the stores. I love seeing my and my neighbors' flags fluttering across the neighborhood. I love watching the flower trucks zooming past the house on their delivery routes. I love the love songs that the radio stations pull out from the archives, sparking memories as I listen. I love the sappy television commercials (Well, except for that dumb one with the couple looking out the window during a storm where the crack of thunder makes her jump. Ugh. Really? Puhleeze.) and all the Hallmark movies with all the Hallmark ads. I even loved watching the two managers of my local grocery store set up their annual flowers and chocolates display at the entry to the store and listening in on their banter while they worked.  I love it all.

I'm a sap. I know that. And I'm perfectly content with it. I like my sappiness. Frankly, I think that a few more people should give in to their inner sap more often. Instead, far too many folks seem to camp on their cynical, critical, jaded side. And this particular holiday seems to bring out the worst of it.

Oh, yes. I went there. I wasn't gonna do it. But I went there. And here's why.

I KNOW that what we experience as the "day-after-New-Year's" headlong media blitz and retail snow job called Valentine's Day promotion is overdone.  I know it and I don't like it any more than the rest of you.  But I don't buy into the commercialism of it all. I recognize that it's way overdone in the media. The car and jewelry and travel and chocolate ads are bent on selling us stuff we don't need.

(Well, okay, we all need some chocolate. And now that I stop to think about it, I might need a bit of a tropical vacation while I'm staring out at all the dirty snow in my front yard. But I digress....)

I also know we're "supposed" to show love and express love every day of the year. Really. And I do, every day. In countless, often menial and unnoticed ways. I mean, I am not scrubbing toilets and sorting stinky socks cuz I'm getting paid so well, right?

I also know that Hallmark and American Greetings and all the other card companies have been cashing in on the holiday. Yada yada yada. I know all that.

And I still don't care. I love Valentine's Day.

I LOVE VALENTINE'S DAY!

I think everyone needs to stop once in a while and play in the puddles of sappiness a little bit. I think everyone should pause and think about their first love for a moment. It is my firm opinion that everyone should take a stroll down memory lane and remember their favorite Valentine's Day. I think we all need a little mush. I am determined that we all ought to find a moment or two - or, say, a whole day! - to let the sentiments of all the glorious, lavish, crazy, sweet, innocent, and interesting kinds of love wash over us.

Husband and wives should take an extra minute to kiss a little naughty.

Don't worry, it won't kill the kids to see it - after all, it's Valentine's Day!

Parents should hug some extra and kiss the sweet faces

of their babies, no matter the age. And if you have teen boys like I do,

it might be the one day that they LET you be a little mushy

and maybe even be a little mushy back!

Siblings should stop and say "I love you" to each other

and acknowledge that the love they share

is vitally important to keeping a family healthy and growing forward.

Friends ought to take a moment and recognize

that their love is sustaining in good times and in bad.

You see, I come to this strong set of feelings out of a long history. My mom always made Valentine's Day special when we were kids growing up. A fancier than normal meal prepared just for the occasion. A card by our plate. A little box of chocolates or conversation hearts from my dad.  A special, usually decadent dessert to share together. It wasn't over the top. It wasn't sensationalized. It wasn't commercialized. It was a pause in the regular routine of our busy home to acknowledge that the everyday love in our home was to be celebrated. To be cherished.

Later, my dad started a tradition when I went off to college of picking out a Valentine's card and sending it to me with a little something that every college kid loves: cash. And while I really appreciated the moolah, what I really treasured was the card. It was all done by him. (I suspect that ours was like many other families - most of the correspondence was from both of my folks but usually carried out by my mom, so his handwriting on the card took on special significance to me.) And even now, when I get that card in the mail addressed to The Boss and I in my Dad's script, I still feel a little thrill.

When the grandkids came along, he continued the tradition by picking out cute little cards for each one of them and tucking a crisp dollar bill inside. And each year, my kids LOVE the anticipation of seeing his distinctive handwriting on the card, addressed to each of them individually. They smile and delight in their "monies" (as Li'l Empress called it this morning) and they revel in the feeling that Grandpa (and Grandma - he signs it for her, too!) loves them. Even though my two oldest are far past the thrill of a simple dollar bill, they tuck it in their pockets with soft smiles. They GET what that card means. They know that they are loved. 

And THAT, my friends is why I love Valentine's Day. It's a beautiful excuse to pause and appreciate the love you have in your life. It's the perfect reason to stop what you are doing and let the ones around you know in no uncertain terms how you feel about them. Celebrate love today. In whatever form it appears in your life - go and celebrate it simply or lavishly. Just be sure you do it.

Sunday Snapshot {odes to love}

Valentine's Day is a big deal around here. Well, let me re-phrase that. It's a big deal to me around here. I take full advantage of the numerous opportunities to share my love for my Gang in all kinds of ways. While they all good natured-ly put on a show of tolerating my smushy surprise hugginess and my gooshy proclamations of love, I have a sneaking suspicion some of them might actually look forward to it. If nothing else, they'll have great memories of Momma makin' a fool of herself. All in the name of love. And around The Gang's house, there are lots of little odes to love to remember each year!

 Come to either of my doors

and you'll be greeted with love!

Love is in the air

out in the front of the house...

...and as you pull in the drive.

For some unknown reason,

these particular little expressions of the holiday

seem to irk my older kids.

Not that I care.

And the little ones love them.

Little hand-made expressions of love

are starting to appear around here

courtesy of some of the Gang members...

who shall remain nameless to protect them

from the good-natured taunting of the older sibs.

and I'm not the only one

tossin' around the sweet nothin's.

Look at all the loot from the grandparents!

Do me a favor? Don't decry the commercialism of the day. Don't get all cynical and grumpy about the cultural hyper-focus on the romance. Instead? Take a moment to hug someone whom you don't ordinarily hug. Share a little chocolate treat with the postman. Or the UPS guy. Just because. Find a creative way to spread some real love around today. We all need a little more love and a little less cynicism these days. You never know the hurt someone is carrying. And cheesey as it might be, Valentine's Day is a fun and easy way to touch that hurt with kindness.

Now. Consider yourself hugged.

It's Not Just a Box

For weeks now, we've been hearing an almost nightly update on Dr. D's box. The box that he has been making in his Manufacturing class at school.

Think updated version of our old shop class in high school.

Add some high-tech tools and way-cool power equipment...

Yeah, I know. A workshop full of power tools and teen boys. Ugh.

It's gotten to be a bit of a joke, in that the moment conversation lulls in the slightest, Dr. D proceeds to share all the minute details of the progress he made that day on this box. Sometimes we even pause our other conversations just to see if he'll pick up the thread of that conversation again, long after we've moved on from it as the main topic.  We like to mess with each other that way.

I must admit that we were not taking him nearly as seriously as we ought to have been. I mean, we didn't really know we should be taking him more seriously, given that he kept saying, "It's not that big a deal, it's just a box" every time we questioned his progress reports or asked for a description as to what kind of box it would be.  He was more focused on telling us the funny and risky pranks some of his classmates would pull and the very laid-back responses the teacher would have to said boy behavior.

There is no way I would EVER be able to be a shop teacher

in a class full of high school boys. Sheesh, that man must have nerves of steel!

But it has been fun to hear how excited he was about the things he's been learning and how much he has enjoyed creating something with his own hands. Still, we were BLOWN.AWAY. when he walked in Thursday night bearing this beautiful piece of workmanship.

Routed raised panel top.

Beautiful cuts and joints.

The top opens to reveal a removable shallow tray.

Inside the box, the slats that hold the shallow tray

in place are also removable. 

Dr. D was poking a bit of fun at me as I was "ooooohing" and "aaaaahing" over his craftsmanship. I kept hitting his arm and saying "This is NOT just a box!"

As I was running my hands over it and listening again to all the details of skills he learned on the project, I just kept thinking of my grandfather. A master carpenter, my grandfather made many beautiful things like this over his lifetime. I have vivid memories of the smells and the sounds of his workroom in their basement in Methuen, listening to him singing while he worked (he favored great Italian tenors!) and seeing his handiwork all over their home and ours.

That's when Dr. D REALLY poked fun at me.... "Are you crying, Mom?"

He asks me this question often.

I have a tendency toward leaky eyes when I'm really happy.

Or proud. Or excited.....

"Yes, Dr. D. I am. Your great-grandfather would love this box. Smelling it and hearing you talk about the joints and the router and the planer reminds me of him. He was a great carpenter and a great man. He would love this box. He would be so proud of you right now."

It is not just a box.

Mom, this post is for you.

Grandpa would be so proud, wouldn't he?

Wordless Wednesday (finally, I'm back!)

Every year, my father-in-law carves ornaments for the kids.

Each ornament is a kind of "living history"

documenting the kids' current interests and hobbies.

This year, as with every year,

he totally nailed it for the littles!

Perry The Platypus

will be adorning our tree and surreptitiously

scoping the area for signs of

the evil Dr. Doofenschmirtz.

I feel much safer now.

Big sister Candace will be keeping an eye

on the hijinx of younger brothers Phineas and Ferb.

Just like LadyBug does! 

And! Kai Lan! will make sure that all her

super! duper! friends! are

Super! HAPPY!

(Isn't that reaction by Li'l Empress PRICELESS?!)

For more Wordless Wednesday fun,

head over to 5 Minutes for Mom.

And don't worry, none of the moms keep

it truly wordless every week :)

Wordless Wednesday

Li'l Empress got some birthday money
from Grandma and Grandpa...

Momma used it to score
some serious bargains for back-to-school.

Don't you think that every little girl should

have some sparkly red shoes for fall and winter?

Or is that just me?

Thank you so much, Grandma and Grandpa!!!!

She loves all her new pretties.

And she LOVES YOU even more!

For  more Wordless Wednesday fun,

head over to 5 Minutes for Moms!

Leave me some comments

and I will be sure to 

come by your WW post too!

Sunday Snapshot

Oh, such a funny story on the way to these pretty pics!

When LadyBug, Li'l Empress, Grandma and I all gathered in the kitchen before church this a.m., we noticed a theme. And consequently, a perfect opportunity for some picture time, if you ask me.

This is the first shot. Pretty much perfect, I think.

And then we requested The Boss to follow up with another. You know, "just in case."  I'm big on the "follow up" pic, even bigger on the "just in case."

Not just with pictures. Kinda generally in life.

But with this second shot, Li'l Empress just.would.not look at the camera. W.O.U.L.D.N.O.T. I even "got in her face" a little, assuming that she was over-tired and acting out.

Finally, she stopped us all in our tracks, by patting Grandma's arm and asking, "What dis arm doin' here foh?"

Oh. My. Word. She COULDN'T look at the camera and smile pretty.

Because she couldn't figure out whose arm that was and what it was doing on her leg.

Those smiles are pure hilarity. She had us totally cracked up.

I have no idea where she comes up with this stuff.

Fourth Fashion

Yesterday, my Gang was decked out to celebrate the fourth... Here's some of the fashions they were sportin' for the festivities of the day.

Baby BlueEyes has lots of

red, white and blue in his dresser.

Apparently, he decided to wear it all at once.

Li'l Empress and Grandma sportin' their

flags and fireworks.

My three little patriots.

Cutie pie cousins with their matching skirts.

They kept telling us they were "twins."

How funny is that?

Come by and join the Fourth fun

at 5 Minutes for Moms.

It's a linky party!

If you want to see some other

fashion - forward cutie pies,

sportin' their red, white, and blue,

head over to We Are Grafted In's holiday post.

See if you can spot Li'l Empress in the mix :)