Friday, June 22, 2012

What She Said

My friend, Kelly has bravely tackled a touchy topic that I have long wrestled with in the adoption community. It was quite the journey to a confident mutual conclusion for The Boss and I while we debated and discussed it. As I researched and processed it, I had some really interesting conversations along the way. Obviously we have come to our own conclusion about the matter.

All of that is to really say that I love how much I've learned about the adoption process and from others within the community along the way. And while I'm certain I have much more to learn, even on this particular topic, I am very glad there are others who can so eloquently articulate thoughts and feelings similar to my own. Especially on topics as sticky as this can be for so many. 

Head over to her blog and check it out.

Just do me a favor? If you disagree with the conversation,
or the topic in general, do it here on my post. And do it nicely.
We learn best from each other when we foster respect in the conversation.


Theressa Putland said...

Here in Australia it is quite uncommon to fundraise for adoption - i'm not sure why that is.

My 2 cents are that to fundraise is not to exploit children because we all know that when we spend all that money on adoption it is not to 'buy' a child. It is to pay for this fee and that fee and this flight and that accomodation on the ROAD TO BRINGING OUR CHILD HOME.

I admire the family who is able to put pride aside to enable them to bring their child home.

My question is this. Does it really need to be this expensive? Who really benefits from the $20000 - $50000 cost of adoption? certainly not the orphanage.

We most definitely could not afford to do another adoption. Breaks my heart.

thanks for the link up!

Aus said...

First off - love the 'reveal' on the room re-do - great stuff there!

As for fundraising - I don't get the "issue" part - I just don't. I guess I don't get it from a bunch of different viewpoints too. I mean hey - adoption isn't for every family - so if you don't adopt you're still OK with me...if you do adopt well great too. If you want to fundraise then great - if not - great too....

Optimum would be for all of this to be free - I mean our government gives away medical care and food and shelter and all of that every day - but then charges folks for this and that and everything else when they want to adopt a child...I'm a tad confused about that one (I'll conceed the point that other governments fees are outside our control but why the US fees when they're all hell bent on giving away all this other stuff?)

It's a personal decision - one that I think many adoptive families struggle to make. OK - but the decision to adopt is pretty tough too - and how to cope with the problems adopted kids can have is another whole set of decisions.

IMHO - those that criticize fund rasing are just looking for "another thing" to criticize when it comes to adoption. I'm thinking they are more the 'anti-adoption' crowd types - and I just let their negative thoughts roll off me. (and if anyone get's negative here - heh - just let me know!) ;)

hugs - aus and co.

Kelly the Overthinker said...

Honored by your words here, Tracy. And, I agree with the above comment - criticism over fundraising for an adoption is more often directed at something else entirely, imo.

Selma said...

We've fund raised for missions trips and more and everytime we have done it I have felt disappointed and discouraged. We live in a world of rather selfish people who prefer to not give so quickly of their time or money. And many people are A-ok with saying that outloud.

Still... just because many people are like that doesn't mean everyone is like that. There are people who geniunely like to know of a need and want to be part of fulfilling that need, even if it means giving $1.00 towards the goal.

I personally love that you are working so hard towards bringing home your sweet girl. I love how out spoken you have been, how you've put yourself out there, and how you keep moving forward and not giving up. It makes me prayerfully cheerlead you on from afar!

Don't be disappointed by others and their responses or their opinions. There are too many of us out there that do want to know and do care. Those are the ones you are "talking to" when you ask, share, write, sell, and more!