Thursday, June 28, 2012

D!T!C! - Finally! and Other Important News

After a long and circuitous route of documentation, detours and delays, we are so very excited to announce that The Gang is finally DTC (Dossier to China) as of Wednesday, June 27th!!!!

For those of you who read around here and are NOT immersed in the sea of three-letter and two-letter adoption-ese, that means our big huge pile of adoption paperwork containing all our most personal, legal and private information has been sent to China. As I type this, that almost-sacred package is winging its way to the Chinese government offices to be logged in to the massive waiting list for prospective adoptive parents.

It also means that we are able to review and consider what are called Special Focus files. Those represent kids from the Waiting Child program who maybe have more complex needs, multiple needs, are older, or often are boys. It's kind of like a micro list within the greater Waiting Child Shared List. Truthfully, it's unlikely that we will find our girl on that particular list considering the "list" of needs that The Boss and I have indicated would be possible for The Gang to accept. This list was created in the early stages of our paper-chase and is based upon a extensive survey of needs and the degree of severity that we feel comfortable accepting responsibility for when we consider parenting a special needs child. For example, we feel completely capable of accepting the file of a child with unilateral hearing loss but not one with total deafness. There's some great explanations of all of that here on this site. (It's also a great site for basic understandings of everything we're doing, if you are interested!)

After DTC, we should receive an LID (Log In Date) in about two to four weeks. At LID, we then have official permission to view any file from the entire Waiting Child program. This will also be the point at which our agency begins actively attempting to match us to a little girl with each monthly release of the Shared List. 

While we are greatly disappointed that our file is only just now being DTC'd (yeah, I just made that up!), we are relying on what we know to be true of the process and more importantly of our God. It's not for nothing, it has a purpose, it's all in His control and He's got our backs. This we know. I sheepishly admit, this was also hard to hang on to when last Monday we got news of yet another delay that brought us yesterday's DTC date. May was an extraordinarily difficult month for our family and early June was more of the same. These delays and detours were certainly a big part of those difficulties. When I say we are "relying" on that which we know, I mean that we kept repeating it to ourselves and to each other and tried to take turns being discouraged as opposed to both of us being disgruntled and disappointed at once. We're a good team, that way.  Heh.

So now we wait for our LID and we increase our prayerful focus on our Brynna girl. This is the part of the journey where we get to really test our trust and our discernment as we review files of the sweet little girls that our lovely Social Worker feels "could maybe" be a match for The Gang. It's no small responsibility when reviewing these files. We must prayerfully consider the needs presented in the medical history, the needs of our current family members, and the dynamics of how those things could interact together. While doing all of THAT, we must also be very careful to remember that the file represents a CHILD. A sweet little girl who could be our daughter. And that she is not her needs. She Is Not Her Needs. That is no small task, given our knowledge of the Waiting Child program and the experiences we had with our first adoption journey to Li'l Empress. We take it all very seriously and your prayers over our family and over our decision-making are appreciated.

We are also excited about another big event going on here at The Gang's house, on this very day. I'll be sure to come back later and try to get my thoughts and feelings and reactions to all of the big doings down here. Suffice it to say, with Li'l Empress heading off to Kindergarten in the fall (sigh, sob, sigh) there are certain interventions and supports that her care team wants to investigate. Those of you who read here with special interest in microtia, atresia, and unilateral hearing loss might particularly want to come back and check it all out. I will LOVE hearing from those of you who have Been There and Done That with your own hearing loss and hearing assistance journeys.


Aus said...

Ya know - this is one of the "post Hague" things I hate...with our three adoptions we found our child before we even started the paper fact after Brianna we were "done" - until she found her sister not once but 3 seperate times on the web sites. Marie had brought adopting another up to me and I was suffering from a massive case of RHD, just not open to even discussing it. Each time she pointed Braelyn out to us. The third time she did that in the space of about a week I had a "God moment" and looked at Marie and told her to contact the agency, request the file and call the social worker to start the process....sometimes God just smacks you over the head with something to get you to listen - and it took Him 3 tries before I heard Him...

As for hearing loss and coping etc - I've got a hearing aid in each ear even as we speak and over the years my hearing has gone from bad to worse - fire away with your questions here or off list or by phone or whatever - happy to discuss with y'all anything I've experienced. Suffice to say that as a "hearing person" who has lost the sense I've got a little different perspective on it!

hugs - aus and co.

Chris said...

Yay that you are DTC'd!!!

Can't wait to find out about the other big event!

Blessings and hugs, my friend.